I have a red spot
at the end of my nose.
I don't have a spot anywhere else -
promise.
But, I have one
at the end of my nose.
Hello again.
I feel I have not blogged for ages.
I have, but not the sort of blog
which free-flows and is as personal as I aim to be.
Lots of things are happening around the
Leaning Towers of pipwilson.com.
Every period of life is strange/unique.
Every day is a fresh start for us all.
In our soul, if not our habits.
'Let us go across to the other side'.
I/me/we are on a journey.
The line between faith and stupidity
is a thin one.
'And leaving the crowd behind'.
Some one say that the way we have lived our lives is stupid.
Some would say that living a life of faith is courageous.
Many have said the former, few the latter.
It seems to me that if you choose the latter,
you still fumble and stumble into the former.
As try as humans can and do,
we are human after all.
'Why are you afraid?'
I don't do afraid much.
I don't scare easily.
And, if you chose to step away from the crowd, the stream,
you expect to feel alone sometimes ..............
'Have you still no faith?'
When I became a Christian at the age of 21
my overriding preoccupation was
'how could God accept someone as thick and stupid as me?'
I knew I wasn't clever.
Never passed an exam at school
(they didn't even tell me when they were happening)
I felt ugly
I was fat
I had a foul mouth - I think I was disgusted with myself.
but I had chosen to get down on my knees and talk to God.
I was determined, not to try this new thing, but commit myself totally and completely.
Things have happened through life - I grew up late. I tell people that I became an adult when I was about forty years old. That is when I accepted ME - myself. I had, for years, believed that God accepted me, I had worked that through, but this 40 thing was when I believed, in all my ugliness - stupidity -miss-education - inarticulateness da de da, I was beautiful.
That is why I tell others they are beautiful.
I believe they are.
AND 99% don't know it and certainly don't FEEL it.
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We have shed a few tears in Wilson Mansions recently.
Beautiful tears.
We are downsizing our home to fit into Mini-Mansions.
We are coming across photos from the expanse of our lives together - and before.
Joan found a letter today from her Grandmother, fondly called 'Mo-Nana', because our kids when they wee little couldn't say 'another Nana'. The letter had been written to Joan on the birth of our first child. Tears flowed down. Beautiful tears ..........
More tears when we are gifted by beautiful humans. We know we would not be able to move on without the help of others and that comes in waves....... tears like waves. Beautiful tears.
We have signed on the dotted line.
It looks like it will be::
Keys to a new door in three weeks time.
Move in to a small flat before Greenbelt.
We consider it to be a
'long now decision'.
We will be able to afford to live there on a pension - eventually.
We will be moving out of London
It will be near where our daughter Joy lives.
It is a small flat in a block of twelve,
ground floor, no garden, council tax a third less,
and 14 minutes walk to a station
so I can continue working and meeting up with you.
We have resided in a place called uncertainty
during the past four months.
Faith is thin line between stupidity and we have stepped into both zones.
Joan and me walk on
with some significant help from others.
We are as appreciate as can possibly be.
All this is personal. I believe in being/becoming as much as able.
That is what 'Level Five' Communication' is all about.
Believe it - live it.
I am moist now - so I will end ....... and it is nothing at all to do with the red spot!
At the very end of my first book
'Gutter Feelings',
I quoted this Bible verse::
'Seek the Shalom of the city
where I have sent you,
because in it's Shalom
you will find your own Shalom'
