Thursday, January 16, 2014

Emotional and Spiritual Intelligence in communication.


It_all_depends_on_the_Lens_you_use.
Make your gaze beautiful.
John O'Donohue.


The pupil of the eye,
the black centre of the human eye,
dilates when it sees beauty.
It opens to allow more light in.
Light itself reflects on the dark centre - 
and the eyes are seen to sparkle.

You are a beautiful human person.

When you see beauty
your eyes reveal it.

You are a beautiful human.

Only 7% of communication is words.
55% of human communication is in the face.
The rest is in the whole of the human frame.

Young humans living on the edge,
those I have yearned to be with,
work with - and love all my many years,
know when I love them or not.

Educated in the University of life,
Streetwise young humans can read
They can read you like a book - 
even if they have never read a book.

We can see a person behaviour but
we cannot see their experience.

We see behaviour and we feel an instant dislike.
We feel scared or awkward or take an immediate dislike.

We can feel 'not ok' about difficult behaviour.
Aggression and violence all the more-so.
Our own feelings stop us thinking straight.
We go into 'fight or flight' mode.
Our eyes contract - our pupils become small
'He had piercing eyes' is often said.

If we can see beyond behaviour.
If we can see beyond behaviour - 
past the behaviour to the soul,
we can feel, not fight or flight, 
but empathy/awareness/identification/sensitivity.
Even LOVE.

An obnoxious person is
a hurting person - I always say.

When we get beyond behaviour,
with any human,
we enter into intimacy.
This is a deep and narrow road.
If there is trust, 
mutual sharing,
mutual vulnerability,
(he who was rich became poor),
we see the soul of the person.
AND
That works both ways.

Emotional Literacy is understanding,
reading, and managing our emotions.
If we train ourselves,
we can receive a feeling, such as fear,
and that signal (feelings are Signals),
and know what to do with that signal.

Fight or flight is unthought out.
Emotional Literacy is thought out.
It is awareness feeding skill.
A skilled person in this area can,
usually with some difficulty,
decide how to manage the language of their body,
and words, tone, facial expression and,
even, if they can love, their eyes.

We have only dipped our toes into awareness.
It is 'The Road Less Travelled'*. 
An invisible road to fumble and stumble along. 
Less travelled, risky, uneven, narrow and 
as the first three words say in that book*, 
LIFE IS DIFFICULT.

You are a beautiful human person.
Believe it.
Follow that with the aim to 'feel it' 
and maybe we can see the beauty also - 
in other beautiful humans.

Pip Wilson.BHP