Wednesday, December 31, 2014

2015 - YES I will ...............



I am going to get my life together in 2015.
Again
I slipped up in 2014.
and forever
imperfection
incompleteness
unfinished work
me ...................

It was all new to me.
I fumbled.
I stumbled.
I wept.
I was inflicted with change.
I was thrown hard balls.
I am alive - 
still.

2014 was full of change.
2014 wasn't really tough,
I am just being dramatic.
But it was full of change
and 
I feel good about the year.
but...............

A year ago today
I never thought 
I would be here
this place
emotionally
spiritually
doing things
I love to do
becoming ..............

I never thought I would be 
this age
it just came
with experience.

I never thought I would be 
a totally freelance facilitator/educator.
I never thought I would be
a Grandad and loving it.

And there has been
many more changes.
Largely through challenges.
My internal Pip
has 
changed,
developed,
become more fragile,
become more sensitive,
become more yearning,
become more seeking,
become more reflective,
become more ............

I wonder what your thoughts are
on this?
I guess you constantly suss me out.
Strive to understand me
me too.

AND I switch to you
do you suss yourself out?
Do you strive to understand
you?

In 2015 I will carry on gigging.
Some in the diary already
a few months ahead
I do =

Hire me
Tell others I am for hire
I need to do this
my life mission
and I need to pay my mortgage
for the next ten years.

I will carry on writing
I will carry on becoming emotionally literate
I will carry on becoming more spiritually literate
I will carry on meeting humans
I will carry on supporting the wounded
I will carry on learning, reading, interacting,

One day some of these will fade away.
I need to come to terms with this.
That, and other decisions,
will be my focus one day
when I get old.

I will read daily.
I will pray with every breath.
I will eat healthier.
I will love.
I will love the unlovely.
I will love myself
I will learn.
I will journey
I will remind you 'you are beautiful'
I will become well travelled
internally
in relationships
in values
in love.
I WILL.

Welcome into my life,
dear 2015.
I will receive your hard balls,
welcome your 
challenges
changes
unthinkables
unwantables
undesirables.
I WILL
I WILL


            Dance like no-one is watching
            Sing like no-one is listening
            and
            Love like you have never been hurt.




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