Sunday, May 07, 2017

Feeling like PINBALL .....

I am desiring to be L5

I am desiring to be L5
(if you don't know what L5 is
read a few blogs of mine
or get the L5 book)
I want /aim to share L5
'tell you who I am'

When I go into a new
~ centre
~ conference
~ group ............
I feel lonely.

NOT all the time!
Just for a few moments
I feel that isolated feeling
I feel it
thank God for feelings
and spring-board from them.

It is not the fault of the group I am with
The centre/conference/hostel etc..
They are my feelings which sweep through me like
restless winds
(and you too - I believe)
but I want to be in touch with these feelings/signals.
I want to feel them all
learn from them all
And that is my striving for further emotional intelligence
a non-stop journey.

When I share feelings about life
It is not the fault of life.
Not the humans around me -
not their fault.
It is not even my fault
they are just feelings!

We have ALL feelings
It's about being human.

Feelings are not right or wrong.
It is behaviour which can be bad or good.
Feelings are real and, unless we reveal them,
others - appropriate others
it builds up =
a volcano will arise in due course........

So I felt periods of NOT OK-ness at life.
Something for me to work through.

One experience of mine was ......
Being able to say to a beautiful human,
a highlight of my day was
when I wiped away a tear from her cheek,
with my right forefinger,
as she was sharing L5 with me.........

AND I step into a Hostel
In a Cafe I experience encounters with 
new & lots I know........

Humans - the work horses of the project
who pour Love out into every cup of tea.

.... and same project
the young guns working there.
Many I know from facilitating groups/conferences
with them as passionate participants.

Some who have had tough lives.
Hard times
mashed up years
Now living in Hostels
Not awaiting 'A level' results
but whether they will have a bed to sleep in tonight ..........

To see them
meet new
feel their warmth
feel the connection

And late night drinks, which is the context
not the depth and the purpose.
Meeting new and old friends.
Meeting once-a-year-friends
Facebook friends for first time.
I Love Love the exchanges.
I loved so much............

Love it
Loved the interactions
the contributions I made
& the feedback too

So I am OK.
I am buzzing.
I am positive
but got lots a feelings
mainly about this week ................