Wednesday, July 19, 2017

"Because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand.”

"Because once you are Real 

you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand.” 

Blob Tree

I facilitate experiences when I conduct training.
Meaning I can only offer myself and my experience AND where I am at - not lecture humans on what to do - what to be…..
Experiential Training then stimulates everyone.
Everyone learns from reflections between the experiences.
Everyone is also the trainer.
I am a learner and a teacher amongst everyone else. 

Self disclosure is always an aim when it comes to awareness and skills training.
Awareness always must precede skills.
If we are not aware - we will not be motivated to develop new skills - and skill development is a lif-long journey.

“Real isn't how you are made," 

said the Skin Horse. 
"It's a thing that happens to you. 
When a child loves you for a long, long time, 
not just to play with, 
but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.”
Margery Williams, The Velveteen Rabbit

We all have  a strong motivation to shed our pretense, our sham, our phoniness and get REAL. 
We all would like to be real. 
Pretending requires so much effort. 
And once we start playing that game, we have to keep playing it. 
We would like to be able to put our real selves on the line rather than put an act on the stage. 
What a relief it would be to tell it like it truly is - to feel safe and secure in vulnerability - just being ourselves. 
We all have abilities and vulnerabilities.
These are both needed in self disclosure if we want to be real.

Such openness, Level Five, challenges us to stretch, to step out of our comfort zone.
Growth does not reside in a place called comfortable. 
To self disclose openly to everyone seems very frightening. 

But not to worry. 
It takes about three weeks, according to some experts, 
to get in the groove of a new habit, 
if we practice it every day. 
I am writing about this in my current book in hand:-
‘5 A Day for Emotional Whole-Becoming.’
(I don’t warm to the term ‘Well-Being’.)

The regular sharing of our human woundedness and weakness 
may well look like a mountain until we start the climbing it. 
My experience is that we can immediately start to recognise ourselves as we practice on this journey. 
We can discover a deeper authentic self.
A beautiful human we had not previously discovered.

"We feel 

when we are loved, 
and to evoke an awareness of beauty in another 
is to give them a precious gift they will never lose." 
John O'Donohue

Dynamically this triggers others to self-disclose - desiring to be real in return
BECAUSE they recognition of our attempted authenticity. 
Both of us - our relationships is BECOMING more real, grounded in an honest self-disclosure. 

I use the Blob Tree Material in facilitation to journey this way.
Gentle ways and then, using different Blob Tree tools,
enter a journey of stretch and BECOMING.
The Blobs are magical in terms of communication.
They seem to open every human heart.
All of us - opening and taking gentle risks for our own development.

Let’s hold hands as we journey.
Share your story with me.
I will love it - Whatever it is.
AND - if you are willing - I will share it here.

"Because once you are Real 

you can't be ugly, 
except to people 
who don't understand.”
Margery Williams, The Velveteen Rabbit