Saturday, February 20, 2021
Friday, February 19, 2021
Rammed file of notes from Mayflower Youth Work 1975/85.
Yesterday I blogged about how I write to reflect and recall all the events of the day.
I am stacked out with 'recordings' = what Youth Workers call notes/reflections on the working day. An example is noting that club member Emma had a bandaged arm as a result of a burn - this reinforces the memory of this so Emma will be asked "How is your arm now" = relationship building. ......... = Emma is not just a club member but also a 'person'.
I have rammed file of notes from Mayflower Youth Work 1975/85. The above and below are are some of the results of when we had to shut the Youth Club for a month due to violence, vandalism, theft and attacks to the staff team - mainly volunteers.
Youth Work continued as a detached project - working with teens on the street, playing football and miscellaneous off site activities/ relationship building opportunities.
These photos are an example of a newsletter we produced regularly to hand deliver to all the Gangs and others formed into a gang.
These were tough days.
So many of our beautiful human teens ended up involved in armed robberies, Borstal, prison, and gun offences.
These attempts at keeping in touch with them, above, will give you a feel of those Youth Work days/years.
More details are in my book
'Gutter Feelings' available from
Lulu.com
https://www.lulu.com/en/us/shop/pip-wilson/gutter-feelings/paperback/product-1nwg6dmw.html?page=1&pageSize=4
BHP
Thursday, February 18, 2021
What do you do before you go to sleep at night?
What do you do before you go to sleep at night?
Read
Pray
Reflect
Trash TV
Bathe
Hot Chocolate
Music
Think
Plan
Work
iPhone
Computer?
I always want to write.
Most times I do at these times.
I want to reflect.
I want to get it out
- the stirrings of the day.
I am tired but in the slowness
I want to connect with my soul.
The innards
the place I want to journey to -
my interior.
I am feeling ...........
I am always feeling
every moment of the day.
I try
strive indeed,
to be in touch with them.
'Feelings' is a good way to take the mask off.
I asked someone today 'how are you feeling?'
I received 'alright' pause 'good'.
I asked again and there was a longer pause -
So few humans are asked that question.
Most, who do ask, don't wait for the answer.
The space is not given.
The eyes don't linger for the reflection.
The eagerness to know is often close to zero.
Then out came a beautiful stream.
Single words -
all from a google of the soul.
The beautiful human spilling.
Not details 'why' all these feelings,
but just words.
Single words.
Powerful words.
Every word with a story behind.
Beautiful.
Two hours later before the peppermint tea and
before separation,
the words turned into stories, thoughts, reflections.
Beautiful.
I am feeling
Yearning to become
A heaviness in my chest
Almost physical
But deeper than that.
I want to understand me more.
I want to be alive more.
I want to sip at the cup more.
I don't get the bit about
'you will never thirst again'.
I am always thirsty.
So my feelings are that deep.
Not many issues in life to be concerned about.
Things to do
emails to answer,
please forgive me, sessions to prep but,
who I am tonight,
I am not afraid of him.
I just want to continue the journey.
I want to refresh my irritation ……..
BHP
Wednesday, February 17, 2021
Why am I afraid to tell you who I am?
Why am I afraid to tell you who I am?
Because if I tell you who I am and you don't like who I am, that is all I have.
That is the title of my favourite book of all time.
The title is on the back cover.
Only the first 10 words are on the front cover.
'WHY AM I AFRAID TO TELL YOU WHO I AM'
I am determined that, on this blog and daily life, that I strive to tell you who I am.
I Go for the dropped mask pose.
Not to show my worst side but my true-as-possible picture.
Yesterday was a strange day. You maybe aware that I have prostate cancer and that it has spread to my spine. Over the Christmas holiday period I had discomfort in my bottom, upper legs & the small of my back. I ended up not being able to sit on anything. I had been taking Paracetamol for the pain but it became so bad that I phoned the cancer hotline - a specialist Nurse. She advised me to take the max Paracetamol meds = 8 a day.
That treatment lasted until yesterday when I decided I would HAVE TO take a stronger pain killer prescribed by my doctor - I had been reluctant for some time.
I have been waking early in the morning and up about 5am to take the meds. Yesterday they were the new tablets for the first time - which consumed at 5am then went back to bed and slept solid.
Up, for the second time in the day, at 10am & largely pain free - I found myself falling asleep a few times - still pain free. NOW I am on 8 tablets a day and trying to spread the positive throughout the day because the gaps hurt.
Sharing this because NOT DOING causes more damage to me, and you if you don't share inner being stuff.
Thank you for being there
Pip BHP
Tuesday, February 16, 2021
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