Tuesday, March 31, 2015

#YoungPeople, all unemployed with their own personal barriers, joined together as freedom writers.

YMCA Bedfordshire wins coveted national award
A group of young writers from YMCA Bedfordshire have been officially recognised for their invaluable contribution to a local school by winning the Community Impact Award, part of The Prince's Trust and Samsung Celebrate Success Awards.

The team of 14 young people, all unemployed and with their own personal barriers, joined together on the YMCA Bedfordshire-run Prince's Trust Hemel Hempstead Team 3 programme. 
They wanted to undertake a challenge that would fulfill a genuine need, deciding to help the Collett School in Hemel Hempstead by replacing the primary school age books for older teenagers with reading difficulties with their own work. 
Setting their sights high, the group wrote and published a series of six books that would inspire and engage the students, raising funds through hosting a pub quiz and persuading local businesses to donate.

Paul Hunt, CEO of YMCA Bedfordshire, said: 
"Every member of the team has been on an individual journey overcoming many barriers and they should all be extremely proud of what they have achieved, not only as a team but also as individuals."




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7 Ways for #Parents to Help Stop #Sexual #Abuse



I think this is fab stuff
Great for Parent and anyone with CARE in their soul.

Teachers / Youth Workers ANYONE
Everyone

NOT by me - source at the FOOT

I shared a savvy piece on my Facebook page last week from Lauren's Kids about how smart parents miss sexual abuse. It got more shares than anything else I posted last week. Or the week before. Or the week before that. Since it struck a nerve, here are some additional tips and resources on this tough topic:

1. Be mindful of the messages you are sending. Do not prep children with these types of directives when you drop them off for a playdate: "Be good," "Do what you're told," or "Listen to the grown-ups." Praising compliance is a slippery slope. "Well-behaved," obedient, passive, quiet children are often targets for grooming, boundary-pushing, and abuse.

2. Stop using punishment as your go-to parenting approach.Punishment creates an "us vs. them" dichotomy that can erode your relationship with your child over time, leaving them not as inclined to come to you when there is a problem or difficulty. Children need to know that you are on their side, no matter what.

3. Pay attention to parenting style. Authority and parenting style are most effective when moderate. All the research shows that an authoritative, "firm and kind" approach, that is emotionally attuned and validates feelings, is healthiest. Punishment's main motivator is fear, and fear of you is not preferred when you have a child faced with a problem as big as inappropriate sexual behavior from an adult in their life -- most likely one you know and trust. The US Department of Health and Human Services' 2010 report on Child Maltreatment noted that only 2.8% of abused children are abused by someone they do not know.

4. Set firm boundaries -- yours and theirs. Pay attention to when you need to say "no," and make space for children to say it, too. Encourage body autonomy by not requiring them to hug or kiss anyone they do not wish to hug and kiss (yes, even grandparents!). In the same vein, I recommend not forcing the issue on eating new foods. Even the "one bite rule" encourages kids to not listen to their own bodies. (Yes, I know they will tell you they are hungry only for cookies. I'm not talking about THAT kind of nonsense.)
5. Teach the proper names for body parts. All the body parts! Get support and practice beforehand if needed. The best approach is not "The Talk," once, and in adolescence. Early and frequent discussion about bodies and their functions, in a developmentally appropriate way, is what's required. 
6. Encourage children to be self-referencing. Ask them often, "How do you feel?" and "What do you think?" Help them identify when they feel nervous and get a "funny feeling" in their tummy. If your little ones believe that you find them important and deserving of patience, they will be much more likely to come to you if they are ever in a situation in which they feel uncomfortable. 
7. Grow your own emotional resilience and competence. When we indicate to our kids that certain things are unspeakable, or that we can't manage strong feelings, or that we would, "never get over it" if X happened, we send a scary message. We convey emotional frailty, and our kids will hide information to protect us from that which they believe we cannot handle. Having emotional resilience and competence does not mean repressing our feelings. It means owning and feeling them, boldly and bravely. This will show our kids that we will rise to the occasion and help them with any problem they may face -- even the ones in our worst fears.

What other tips or advice might you share?

This article was originally posted at www.sarahmaclaughlin.comwhere Sarah offers skills and support for calm, cool, and compassionate parents.


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Being and #Becoming #Authentic #Vulnerable - NOT PRETEND-FACE




REACH-OUT - GET IN-TOUCH


When it comes down to managing life, coping with tough times, difficult relationships


When it comes down to managing life, 
coping with tough times, 
difficult relationships - 
it comes down to what is going on inside you 
the beautiful human.

We can only be with, 
manage, cope with another who is kicking off in your space 
IF we manage our own emotions.

That internal BHP.
Feelings
Swirling thoughts
Anger feelings
Put-down feelings
Shame
Resentment
FEELING CRAP ....... 
we can learn to manage - learn skills like 
emotional literacy - emotional intelligence.
We can have our 5-A-DAY in Emotionally

Follow me here
AND I am available to conduct facilitation and training in these areas of life.

Get a life = get skilled up - we can do it .............


THIS is part of a #BlobTree Tool called 'emotional resilience' - learn how to use it - connect with others.


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Hire me - Trainer, TeamTraining, Hard-to-reach, group worker, support 121


Hire me - Trainer, TeamTraining, Hard-to-reach, group worker, support 121



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Monday, March 30, 2015

You are many things ..... this is just ONE





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An encounter with Charlie Chaplin in London Town


I have been doing it for years - once with as many as 30,000 people.
Often with hundreds
sometimes with people sat around round table in a conference with cabaret style seating.
Sometimes when they are standing in a circle.

I get people to touch their unique finger tips - one had reaching out one way and another the other way.
Beautiful to see a network of finger tips touching - a beautiful net of humans who are smiling at the same time.
You could call it an ice-breaker.
With meaning !

You may have seen my Pipturesques on Pipstagram on this page or on the the Instagram page + Facebook + Twitter - I do it once and then they filter into these social networks AND my website here.
I love collecting Pipturesques of groups touching tips and myself with anyone appropriate - Charlie here was obliging but not really communicating - poor eye contact, expressionless, no smiling - actually - he could have been almost cold and motionless - not very much alive.

I will carry on  touching tips around the world - even with famous static/frozen/cold humans - because I love it.

Setting a climate of trust is always a big aim.
Encouraging people to take a risk for their own development -  a small one first and then moving on into the experiential where we all begin to feel things - and then dig into feelings too.

Most behaviour comes out of feelings and, as we all know, some of that behaviour is not good - with not good feelings.
I yearn to understand all this.
Each time I work with a group - every-time - I am learning from those present and my own feelings/behaviour and digging into my thought processes.

If I can encourage someone to get on the road to 'becoming' - that is a great step .............. a journey of change has began ...
....a chosen journey toward becoming whole - 
The Road Less Travelled


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Friday, March 27, 2015

Ever felt a bit #CRAP ? #GermanWings

12 men
every day
in the UK
commit SUICIDE



The sort of #music I love 2 hours for you here

The sort of music I love
2 hours for you here






1.Abraham's ThemebyVangelis

2.Don't WaitbyBonobo
3.D-T (Dorian Concept Remix)byLetherette
4.ClearbyDark Sky
5.Something In The Air (Bonobo remix)byMaya Janes Coles
6.Mama's WisdombyCatching Flies
7.Primative People (Tale of Us Remix)byMano Le Tough
8.LydiabyDauwd
9.Maputo JambyCut Head
10.Moon CirlcesbyMaribou State
11.We Are Fine (Tourist Remix)bySharon Van Etten
12.Porchlight and Rocking Chairs (KiNK Remix)byJimpster
13.NaokobyLorca
14.First Fires (Maya Jane Coles remix)byBonobo
15.Drops (Pedestrian Edit)byJungle
16.LapwingbyWerkha
17.RequiembyTen Walls
18.Bissao (Pilooski Edit)byFrancis Bebey
19.Woo HabyGeneral Ludd
20.JimmybyRomare
21.ReflectedbyWill Arcane
22.Hey Now (Bonobo remix)byLondon Grammar
23.Decisions feat. Emily KingbyTaylor Mcferrin
24.The Tempest feat. Adda KalehbyThrowing Snow
25.Runnin' (Machinedrum remix)byKelis
26.Embryonic (lone remix)byIllum Sphere
27.Glassbeadgames (8 hours at fabric dub)

#StiffUpperLip ! I wonder if that crash pilot had talked with someone about #feelings = #GermanWings



I wonder if that crash pilot had talked with someone about  
So many BHPs talk all sorts ..... ANYTHING BUT..... 
FEELINGS
Even with friends.

I know I keep going on about this stuff.
Emotional intelligence.
Emotional Literacy = able to be literate about our inner life............ EVEN WITH OUR CLOSEST FRIENDS
PARTNERS !!!!!!!!!!

12 men in the UK will commit suicide today.
Most of them BHP's will be smily friendly chatty humans - no-one knowing that there is a dark cloud lodged in their soul.
#Mental Health - it's an illness but so SO tied up with SHAME = the stuff we cannot talk about.
and no-one ever challenges my statement here





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Thursday, March 26, 2015

I see #Beautiful in you because you are beautiful


I accept you 
Just as you are. 
I may not enjoy your 
Language 
Values 
Behaviour 
Pleasures 
(even if you don't like me) 
I accept you/your ALL




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Youth Workers, City YMCA London and other Vacancies Nationwide



LATEST VACANCIES


My current reading about the teenage brain.


I am reading a book about the teenage brain.
Latest chapter was about bumps to the head.
Blows to the head and what happens in the skull as the brain bounces around in the protective fluid.
How important it is to take any knock seriously especially for young people or children.
It's good how my sport, #RugbyLeague , and others are dealing with slightly concussed players quiet militarily.

Sometimes there is a delay of days/weeks - even longer before there are symptoms.
I have seriously tried to remember if I had a head blow in my childhood because my learning is slow - and still is. 
I was nearly a teen before I could read!
Our Conniepops wrote down an order for an Indian takeaway for four adults just by listening to us word 'chicken tikka biriani' etc - and she is only just turned five years old.

I still can't spell (thank you for your consistent help Miss Spellchecker) !


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Wednesday, March 25, 2015

#RugbyLeague teaching #RugbyUnion - they need it too !


#LevelFive communication - powerful / nurturing #relationships





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I #BoycottStarbucks


#Emotions - #Feelings and how good they are


is a strength not a weakness. 
If we hide it 
we are not being authentic. 
We are offering only part of self 
into a relationship

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How you are feeling? 
Are you able to get in touch with them? 
If we put a word to a feeling weare managing them - not scared. 
 & SAD - everything would come under one of those. Be more specific.

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All feelings are good. 
But not if we don’t learn to manage them. 

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#Angry? 
Take a deep breath before you speak, 
because your mouth acts quicker 
than your brain
because feelings
travel faster to the brain
than thinking.

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