Wednesday, September 30, 2009

This is the speech by Gordon Brown yesterday.
PM of UK.
The largest words tell us how often teach it was used.
I caught some of it online yesterday.
A few times my eyes felt that tweek of emotion.
I always get that when poverty, justice, injustice, are held up.
I am where he was.
And, as a poor communicator - he did well.
I think he is a good workhorse with a passion and vision.
He is not glam.
Do we go for image or substance, the whole or part of the Nation?
I shudder to think what will happen to the Nation of the Tories get in.
I remember the Thatcher years as I worked with the urban poor - disregarded and I felt it.
It is up to us in the UK.
We will see ................

Police are in the news again.

Officers and Police forces being charged with neglect and serious assault.

I know that, at the same time, there are serious offenders out there who cause all sorts of problems for members of the community including the Police.
The Police, of course, are in the front line having to deal with it.
Often dealing with violence so wicked
And when they deal with it - they themselves can be charged with crime by offenders trying to play the system.

It seems to me that the Police reflect the whole of our society.
There are badly behaving apples in the barrels.

I take the line that Police men and women are beautiful humans.
Some have behavioural problems - like some of us.
I also think that some of the behaviour mirrors the behaviour of gangs.
I have a background of working with and studying gangs.

In my first book I had a chapter about the Police.
I experienced behaviour from them. The following actually happened - and here is an extract from my book::

"The police were especially abusing the young people by using drunk charges unjustly, it seems to me. A drink charge was a minor offence and didn’t warrant legal aid, so the young person had to handle the court and his defence himself! You can imagine what a mess an inarticulate, nervous seventeen-year-old would make of this. The police however, trained in court procedures, had their patter ready, and the teenager had no chance unrepresented."

Also, as I worked alongside young people, and believe me they were no angels, I found that they were being harassed by humans in authority, those responsible to uphold the law - the Police.
The Police were::

*Police throwing stink bombs into cells when kids were being held awaiting charges.
*Police carrying water pistols in D.S.U. vehicles and shooting at teenagers they passed in the street, or spraying them with water from squeezy bottles.
*Wearing ‘funny masks’ in vehicles and in police stations, and playing practical jokes on prisoners in the cells.
*The wearing of little red flags in the caps of officers while on patrol, according to the number of time they have ‘nicked’ the three most scapegoated teenagers.
*Throwing cups of water over prisoners when stripped for forensic purposes.
*Physical blows to those arrested.

You may have difficulty in believing all this, but I have evidence that it is true...... these cases of harassment was not isolated. I have a whole file of incidents that were reported to me by our teenage boys, together with details of the names and numbers of the officers involved."
Extract from
Gutter Feelings

The book gives further details and efforts to work for justice and stand alongside the young humans who we loved.

That is why I weep when I see injustice - and see justice being worked at and sometimes being achieved.
Justice holds hands firmly with the acts of LOVE and the creator of it.

We need to apply these actions for justice with all members of society.
Striving for justice when Police officers are wrongly accused.
Striving for justice when young gang members are wrongly accused.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Eternal Reference:: in here every game I have created. From wild and messy to deep and spiritual.

-- Posted from Pip's iPhone
You are beautiful.
Big Book of Blobs

Big Book of Blobs

Click to enlarge

Add To Basket
A photocopiable collection of blob pictures to promote discussion. These blob pictures offer a unique way to initiate discussion about all sorts of issues and subjects. They are organised into themes and scenarios that include: Places - beach, cinema, cliff, concert, disco, homes, playground, staffroom, village | Issues - bullying, death, disaster, divide, fame, families, feast, money, parents, protests, romance, sleep, talk, water safety, world | Occasions - Christmas, Easter, football, lecture, nativity, Olympics, skateboarding | Personal Development - body, caged, caring, doors, leaps, river, rock, shadows, valley, vertigo. Each picture is accompanied by ideas and questions to kick-start class, group or one-to-one discussion. Complete book included on accompanying CD Rom.
Blob Jigsaw by Ian Long Pip Wilson (Artwork) in Lifestyle & Art

Download: 1 documents, 720 KB (Click for details)

A jigsaw provides us with a way of breaking up aspects of who we are into small, manageable pieces.

The Blob Jigsaw looks at aspects of our lives,

providing a way to open discussion about the whole person.

No piece is labelled, so that each one is open to interpretation.

If you cut it up it also provides a kinaesthetic approach

to people who like to touch things as they talk.

Who are you?
Who are you in touch with?

I am in touch with humans who are going through tough times
I am in touch with humans who have gone through tough times
I am in touch with humans, and privileged to be so,
who are going through massively complex and extremely excruciating times.

If you have a bed to sleep in tonight.
Thank God,
or whoever you acknowledge,
for this privilege.

If you could not sleep in your own home tonight,
where would you go to sleep?
Think - not just read.
OK - a friend or relative - I guess.

Second question - how long could you sleep there
before you felt you would need to move on?
Think - decide - don't just read.
If you had no money, no bank account
and you had to leave home/relative/friend - where would you go?
If you was not wanted at home,
if not welcome amongst your friends - how would you feel inside?

So many young humans, and much older ones,
have experienced relationship breakdowns.
Often caused by substance misuse, behaviour,
mental health issues, slump of confidence including basic inadequacy.
These humans are in pain and it is not chosen.
It is a slide into poverty, of spirit too, and a massive stigma.

The cycle for them will not change
unless other humans step out of their comfort zones
and contribute to those who are in greater need than themselves.
We can always position ourselves as 'needy'.
If we always only look to see those who are richer.
Yet so often, never really consider, or even look to see,
those who are, so called,'below' us.

All of us cannot sell up and go and live in the poorest community.
All of us cannot us cannot stand alongside homeless humans.
All of us cannot us cannot change jobs to work alongside youngsters in vital need.
All of us cannot, yes we can, look out for those
who are on the fringe of our
social network
frequented haunts
everyday places
and go out to them
like no other
who they have met that day.

"To be free is to know who we are,
with all that is beautiful,
all the brokenness in us;
it is to love our own values,
to embrace them,
and to develop them;
it is to be anchored in a vision and a truth
but also to be open to others and so,
to change.
Freedom lies in discovering that the truth
is not a set of fixed certitudes
but a mystery we enter into,
one step at a time.
It is a process of going deeper
and deeper
into an unfathomable reality."

Jean Vanier
Becoming Human

Monday, September 28, 2009

Church for the second time today
Walked by the water today -
without feeling guilty.
Zig is being bullied
by the local Mafia Cats.
Frightened of going out.

Excited today about a new book concept.

I am collecting women's tights today,
need about thirty five.
I only have eleven.
Don't get excited,
it's only for a game!

I believe I know who I am.
Do you?

I feel that we all want to be
who we are created to be.
Some of us accept that instant coffee is not the best.
That gives us satisfaction and hope
to be all that we can be
and know that it is about becoming.
That is much more important.

I know who I am and
that gives me security.
The trouble is, life does not stand still.
I need to become anew.
I need to change on this new roadway.
I cannot be resting securely.
I need to journey on and
become become become.

So I am not here in Smugville -
Telling you I know who I am -
I do know but, life has moved away -

I know I am a beautiful human person.
That is a vital stepping stone over the torrents.

I know I am
beautiful imperfection
it gives me support because I am not alone.
I know that you too
are beautiful imperfection.

Join me on
The Road Less Travelled.

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Right -
are you up for this?

1 Click the Blob Picture to enlarge.
2 Decide which of the four - BEST describes you at the moment?
3 To make it real, more powerful, reach out and touch the one you chose.
4 If anyone else is around, do it together because that is even more powerful.

Thank you
You are beautiful.

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Emotional Intelligence and BLOBOLOGY stuff.

why touch?

I found that when
I got to grips with my feelings,

or started to,

I began to grow as a human person.

I often I say
I became an adult
at the age of (about)
forty years old.

That was part of my journey inward.

The opening and the owning

of those vivid things

which seem to influence life

so powerfully ...

... negative or positive.

"The unreflected life is not worth living" Socrates

I am with a group of young humans.
I am using this Blob Tool,

other similar ones
are in books with links below.

I have just led a group
through a process
into this stage.
ALL to facilitate opportunities
for all of us
to step outside
our comfort zones
where growth resides.

I launched in ........
'Which Blob is you
right now in terms of feelings?'(above)

I start by revealing something of myself.
Taking the risky road
sharing a vulnerability,
I have plenty to chose from.
Then I opened the question up
for others
and ........

......... fantastic level of sharing burst forth.One young human spoke first.
He was a fiery ball of emotion
and presented unpredictable behaviour daily.

As he spoke,
the silence was deep and intense.
He said what his life was currently,
and moved on to say,
how he wanted it to become.
All by using the Blob Tool.

His large step
was for himself
and for others,
because he knew that,
he had heard me,
that it was good for the group
if the first one to speak
set the benchmark high,
- or in this case low low low.

What grabbed my soul was
his honesty
in terms of sharing feelings.

Each human in the group
was taking a risks for their own development.
Raw and to the bone.

Because it is not only about,

which Blob describes your feelings,
....... but
why these feelings exist?

Then it came out.

When you work with humans
who have had massive disasters
in their childhoods
,followed by later crippling blows,
it is something extra special
to hear their stories.

'We can see a persons behaviour,
but we cannot see their experience'

And when they hear the stories of others
it comforts their souls.

We end by picking a future positive Blob.

I encourage all to end with a positive,
healing sharing.

'What/where do they want to be?'
and I join in all the way through.

Beautifully so,

I can see people moving forward.

I see them progressing
in their emotional life.
Some of them building on their self knowledge,

self esteem and growing in stature.

The wholeness of Shalom.

I love it love it
and it means I am reaching out

and being touched myself

by a Shalom finger tip,
being blessed,
being shaken,
being changed
in the presence
of these beautiful humans.
I experience



Now what are you thinking of doing with this Blob Tool?
The best way would be to print off,
and get others talking and sharing too.
Just thinking about it
hasn't got the same impact.
It needs interaction to enable it to live.
Over to you - the challenge I leave with you
No oppression - just a challenge.

Links to further Blob Tools::


Pink Blue or Green below. Which do you need most? Which do you feel most? What colour, any colour, would bbest describe YOU right now. Tell someone

-- Posted from Pip's iPhone
You are beautiful.

Friday, September 25, 2009


(I am listening to dubstep at the mo)
but I feel you are a deep well
capped volcano
unreserved beauty
yearning to love
eyes wide open

I would like to get to know you better
one day/every day/if we keep in touch

stay beautiful


Thursday, September 24, 2009

The heart is never "successful." it just seeks a personal relationship with another,

"The heart is never "successful."
It does not want power, honours, privilege or efficacy;
it seeks a personal relationship with another,
a communion of hearts, which is the to-and-fro of love.
This opening of the heart implies vulnerability
and the offering of our needs and weaknesses.
The heart gives and receives but above all, it gives.
The heart goes out to those who are humble
and who cry out in the weakness and their need for understanding and love.
It is the human heart and its need for communion
that weakens the walls of ideology and prejudice.
It leads us from closedness to openness,
from the illusion of superiority to vulnerability and humility.
Because of this instead of finding security in the group
we find it in our hearts,
which have found a new inner strength,
a real maturity."

Jean Vanier,
'Becoming Human'.

New to Big School ......

"I am a bit frightened about what it's going to be like going from being at the top of this school to being at the bottom of a big new school.....

..... the children made masks to explore the difference between how they were feeling inside, and how they presented their feelings to people around them.

"On the first mask I made I wrote 'scared' to say how I felt," says Imane.
"But after talking about it I felt a bit better, so I made another mask which said 'confident' on it."

"One thing about making masks and writing our feelings on them
was that we could see that we all felt the same inside,
however we looked on the outside,"
says Anna Asiamah, 11.
Fahmida Khan, 10, agrees.
"It was easier to write down how you were feeling on a mask than to have to say it out loud - but once you'd written it down, it became easier to talk about it," she says.

Late night
Wilson Mansions.

Peppermint tea
late night TV
Sky Arts 1 HD
Brian Wilson
but soon it will be::
hey hey

Had some strange feelings today
still not settled.
Believe it is all the right thing
but it is the internal stuff.

Joan and me walked today.
Where we have moved from
we would be walking alongside double decker buses
speeding London vehicle hub-bub.
We just did not walk
other to the Bus/Train/Tube.
Today we walked alongside water.

I am used to working hard
and playing hard.
I feel I have moved
from the former to
the latter.

It is all internal ajustment
but today I felt it deep.
Just one hour - I felt like that.
I need to work it through.
Understand it.
Joan says she does.
She is settled.
She is aware of my wolfness restlesness.
Bless her.
Bless you.

No better blessing than one from my great friend,
who left us to compose his writings for Angels.
John O Donohue

This is so wondrously so beautiful.
Read it
let it soak into your soul

Blessed be the longing that brought you here
And quickens your soul with wonder.

May you have the courage to listen to the voice of desire
That disturbs you when you have settled for something safe.

May you have the wisdom to enter generously into your own unease
To disover the new direction your longing wants you to take.

May the forms of your belonging- in love, creativity, and friendship-
Be equal to the grandeur and the call of your soul.

May the one you long for long for you.

May your dreams gradually reveal the destination of your desire.

May a secret Providence guide your thought and nurture your feeling.

May your mind inhabit your life with the sureness with which your body inhabits the world.

May your heart never be haunted by ghost-structures of old damage.

May you come to accept your longing as divine urgency.

May you know the urgency with which God longs for you.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

What do you do before you go to bed at night?
Trash TV
Hot Chocolate

I always want to blog.
Most times I do at these times.
I want to reflect.
I want to get it out
- the stirrings of the day.

I am tired but in the slowness
I want to connect with my soul.
The innards
the place I want to journey to -
my interior.

I am feeling ...........
I am always feeling
every moment of the day.
I try
strive indeed,
to be in touch with them.

'Why am I afraid to tell you who I am,
because if I tell you who I am,
that is all I have'.

That is the title of my favourite book of all time.
I try to tell you who I am.
And myself 'who I am'.
I am committed to it.

'Feelings' is a good way to take the mask off.
I asked someone today 'how are you feeling?'
I received 'alright' pause 'good'.
I asked again and there was a longer pause -
So few humans are asked that question.
Most, who do ask, don't wait for the answer.
The space is not given.
The eyes don't linger for the reflection.
The eagerness to know is often close to zero.

Then out came a beautiful stream.
Single words -
all from a google of the soul.
The beautiful human spilling.
Not details 'why' all these feelings,
but just words.
Single words.
Powerful words.
Every word with a story behind.

Two hours later before the peppermint tea and
before separation,
the words turned into stories, thoughts, reflections.

I am feeling
Yearning to become
A heaviness in my chest
Almost physical
But deeper than that.

I want to understand me more.
I want to be alive more.
I want to sip at the cup more.

I don't get the bit about
'you will never thirst again'.
I am always thirsty.

So my feelings are that deep.
Not many issues in life to be concerned about.
Things to do
emails to answer,
please forgive me, sessions to prep but,
who I am tonight,
I am not afraid of him.
I just want to continue the journey.
Today I was on a Bus in central London.
There was a vicious racially motivated attack.
It was an attack.
Language and blows.
Aggression and violence.

It disturbed all on the crowded bus.
Fear more than disturbed.
I have seen so much of it in my life.
I have seen a young mans head being kicked around like a ball.
I have experienced knives, pick axes, meat cleavers
all in the hands of humans out of control.
As today.

I once was passing a corridor with two young men fighting with knives.
I walked on because what I had to deal with
was much worse.

I hate violence.
I run training sessions for workers
about managing aggression and violence but
I hate it hate it.
It is a result of surges of emotion taking over the human.
Fear, insecurity, anger alongside lack of emotional intelligence.

We do it too,when we snap back at the persons we love.
It comes out of the same place.
It is built up in tribes, gangs, crowds and Nations too.
Lord have mercy.

We have much to do.
We have so much loving to do.

If we are not part of the solution
we are
part of the problem.

May God bless you with discomfort
At easy answers, half truths and superficial relationships,
So that you may live deep within your heart

May God bless you with anger
At injustice, oppression and exploitation of people,
So that you may work for justice, freedom and peace.

May God bless you with tears
To shed for those who suffer pain, rejection, hunger and war,
So that you may reach out your hand to comfort and
To turn their pain into joy.

And may God bless you with enough foolishness
To believe that you can make a difference in the world,
So you can do what others claim cannot be done
To bring justice and kindness to all our children and the poor

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Two movies I want to see::
Fish Tank
The Firm
both related to my work.
Both, I understand, are powerful
will hate them
love them.
Mos Def

The will bring back memories from the past
They will teach me to tune in
as I am eye ball to eye ball
with hurt
low self esteem
low confidence
hard exterior
soft soul.
Mos Def

Zig has started venturing out.
Will take some time to settle into new home
(must stop saying house)
like me.
Mos Def

I live by stimulus
tough things
painful things
humans in pain
me in struggle
to connect
to love
to communicate
to love mainly.
Mos Def

Little Sheila is with child.
Also it is her birthday Wednesday.
When they are children
they are dependent
not far away usually.
When they are older
and far away
and loving them more
miss them wildly.
Mos Def

I like iTunes 9
Love the extension in Genius feature.
Love the Mixes it creates for me
in genres
try it
better than it sounds.
Mos Def.

iTunes 9
Like the home share thingy.
I capture music and video
and this feature helps me transfer
from my iMac to Lappy.
Mos Def

iTunes 9
has a fault on the SMART playlist feature
to iPhone
It won't move my 'recently added'
to a playlist as I have used
the one I commute to
the one I drive to.
clicked Appleville twice.
Guess a bug fix soon.
Mos Def

I am feeling::
Mos Def

These are five words to describe my life at the moment.
And you .....................................................................?

If you do it.
Real life becomes touchable.
We open ourselves up.
We connect to our soul.
Mos Def

To share with me
who places it on my Blog
(first name only)
Means you take a mask off
Mos Def

Dance like no-one is watching
Sing like no-one is listening
Love like you have never been hurt.

Recent Tools/Publications::

Monday, September 21, 2009

'So often we build prisons for ourselves.
We blame others for our confines,
but it us who constrict ourselves all along.
Most of the walls in our lives we build ourselves.
But sometimes,
just once in a while,
we get a glimpse of the infinity of the universe and know that God is at work.
That's when we must choose to stay in the prison or grasp the risk'

John Donaghue
from 'Anam Cara'

Delinquents 'misinterpret anger'

Young man
Seeing anger where it does not exist can lead to trouble

Teenage boys who get into trouble with the law may find it hard to interpret social cues in others, say researchers.

This is real stuff for me.Captured from the BBC news.

I always work with groups and make the point that communication is only 7% words, 55% facial expression and the rest is the remaining elements of the human frame.

A Japanese study of 24 young offenders found they mistook facial expressions of disgust for anger more often than their peers.

In Child and Adolescent Psychiatry and Mental Health journal, the researchers said this might lead them to see a situation as more hostile than it was.

One UK expert said the ability to read facial expressions was "fundamental".

The team showed photos of faces expressing six basic emotions to 24 incarcerated young men and the same number of youths who had not been in trouble with the law.

Misrecognising an expression may lead to incorrectly feeling threatened and even to antisocial behaviour
Professor Karen Pine, University of Hertfordshire

The participants were asked to match each face with an emotion - anger, disgust, fear, happiness, sadness, or surprise.

Analysis showed the delinquent youths were more likely to mistake disgust for anger than their peers.

The researchers said it was the first real evidence that young offenders may have trouble distinguishing between disgust and anger.

But it supports previous work that showed children with conduct problems tend to perceive other emotions as anger.

And it has also been shown that juvenile delinquents often have short tempers and experience more intense anger than other children.


Study leader Wataru Sato from Kyoto University said: "This bias towards misrecognising other emotions as anger is particularly significant because anger appears to play an important role in delinquency.

"Taken together the data suggest that delinquents might be projecting their own heightened angry emotions onto others when they misperceive others' negative, but not hostile, emotional states as anger."

Professor Karen Pine, an expert in developmental psychology at the University of Hertfordshire, said the ability to "read" a person's emotions from their facial expressions "is fundamental to us as social beings".

Failure to understand an expression could lead to one feeling threatened without due cause, and even to antisocial behaviour, she added.

"This is consistent with previous evidence and has been shown to account for some conduct problems in children."

But she stressed the latest findings should be interpreted with caution because errors were also made by the young men who had not been in trouble, albeit less frequently.

"The delinquents also had significantly lower IQs than the control group and this alone may have accounted for their poor performance on the task," she added.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

We have stopped going to church .............

We have stopped going to Church.
We stopped going when we left Romford.
Four weeks without it.
This is a chance to break free.
So, we have stopped going to church for good.
Have decided that they are all
emotionally unintelligent
old people
young people
drug dependents
socially incompetents
middle class
working class
factory workers
office workers
well dressed
poorly dressed
too friendly
too shy
just like me
so we went to Church this morning.

We stepped into an unknown community.
As an unknown.
As a stranger in a strange town.

Found myself observing.
self conscious
wondering how they do it.
I had to make a decision to let God in.
Let the experience be a spiritual one.
Not just a social experiment.
To listen
to receive
to bBlessed
to be present.
God was in the house.
As with every situation.
(Must do a talk about this at Greenbelt
Oh - yes, thinks, I did one on that this year.
Spiritual intelligence alongside
Spiritual intelligence.)

In the last community,
in fact the last four communities,
I was a community leader.
I was known around the streets,
shops, pubs and shopping halls.
Several generations of kids said hello.
Long after they were kids too!

Now I am face-value.
What you see is what you get.
I like this.
It is just communicating with humans.
It is doing that
and with the Divine.

I want to belong to a faith community.
I belong to a number really.
Informal and more formal.
I want to belong to humans who tick the boxes above.
Some, many of them,
just like me.

I will keep you in touch.
With the journey.
With interior one.

Saturday, September 19, 2009

One step nearer to hell today.

NO not visiting a DIY store.

Took Joan and Sheila to a Garden Centre.


Contaminated !!!

Now back at sheilas for a coffee before the big Rugby League game tonight.
Come on the Saints

-- Posted from Pip's iPhone
You are beautiful.

Tried to post last night from d train out of London town. Failed.

-- Posted from Pip's iPhone
You are beautiful.
:: Life disturbed, life striding, life changing, left all behind. All but - not humans. Human relationships - never. Relationships abiding, relationships live on beyond miles, beyond boundaries, beyond bars, beyond distance, beyond seas, beyond belief, beyond difference, beyond individual uniqueness, beyond beyond beyond beyond .........

Thursday, September 17, 2009

:: :: :: :: QUOTE :: :: ::

First they came for the Jews
and I did not speak out -
because I was not a Jew

Then they came for the communists
and I did not speak out -
because I was not a communist.

Then they came for the trade unionists
and I did not speak out -
because I was not a trade unionist.

Then they came for me -
and there was no one left
to speak out for me.

Pastor Niemoeller, victim of the Nazis