Wednesday, February 24, 2021

Reflecting on Lockdown life at Wilson Mansions ............

 Here I am.

Lockdown like you are.

Alongside that I am working daily at living with cancer. The meds - increasingly needing to be more powerful, sleep & sleepless plus fatigue which is only one of a few side effects.

Otherwise life goes on. A walk a day and built in shopping (I have never been in a shop for a year other than the pharmacy  -   '1 in 1 out' shop!) The walking plan is waiting for spring and warmer weather to enable more exercise.

Moreso is the chance/hope of seeing family together especially our two grandaughters (5 and 10) - last time they did a drive by - I cried ......... some feelings can't be articulated enough.

5am out of bed this morning to start the 8 a day pain killer tablets. Normal life now - to time table life around the meds schedule. I drink loads and loads of water. I don't touch alcohol at all now. I used to have a glass of red if we were out for a meal - but never done either for a pandemic year!

Other aspects of life rolled on. No gigs which I miss madly - the preparation, working with teams of teachers, therapists, youth-workers, student teachers, and various groupings internationally - all experiential learning - I love it. Feeds me!!

Close behind the above number one is my meeting 121 in my Central London 'Cafe-shop home' (now disappeared - off the map via covid damage)

I write every day. I promote the Blob Tree resources online & reflect on life via my BLOG.

Then there is my ever so bursting email inbox .......... AND in the last couple of days I have had two surprising cold contact' out of the blue. 

1:: someone interested in tapping my crime and gangs experiences. Right up my street as I have had to work and live through such experiences -  you will know about this if you have read my books 'Gutter Feelings' 'Backstreets of Heaven' and others.

2:: A young lad who I lived/worked with who is now in his 60's - never heard from him since 1967 = 54 years.

I can't tell you more - respecting confidentiality. 

More tomorrow and ever after ........


Tuesday, February 23, 2021

LOVE:: Be passionate with it / learning LOVE is non-stop =Love steps outside our comfort zone


YOUTH WORK is being on the same level - valuing the human - seeing beyond behaviour BEYOND BEYOND .......


Let me break this down:
1. If you have to demand respect, it’s not respect.
2. If you see our youth as Sacred, what’s there not to respect?
3. Correcting unacceptable behavior is effectively done with respect.
4. Recognizing the pain behind the behavior is only seen with eyes of love and respect.
5. If it’s not unconditional love and respect, then it’s not love and respect.
6. If love and respect are not the foundation of the work with our youth, it’s not youth work.
7. Put that ego away before you hurt someone.

Our character is disclosed .....

Monday, February 22, 2021

One Day .................. children will ask ................

 One day..... 

youngsters will learn words 
they will not understand. 

Children from India will ask: 
What is hunger? 

Children from Alabama will ask: 
What is racial segregation? 

Children from Hiroshima will ask: 
What is the atomic bomb? 

Children in schools will ask: • 
What is war? 

You will answer them. 
You will tell them 

Those words are not used anymore, 
Like crucifixions, galleys or slavery 

Words no longer meaningful. 
That is why they have been removed from dictionaries. 

Martin Luther King, preacher, civil rights activist

With training and a will to love we can train our brain to take over when under pressure/threat.


I WAS ONCE  on a Bus in central London.
There was a vicious racially motivated attack.
It was an attack.
Language and blows.
Aggression and violence.

It disturbed all on the crowded bus.
Fear more than disturbed.
I have seen so much of it in my life.
I have seen a young mans head being kicked around like a ball.
I have experienced knives, pick axes, meat cleavers
all in the hands of humans out of control.
As today.

I once was passing a Youth Club corridor with two young men fighting with knives.
I walked on because what I had to deal with 
was much worse.

I hate violence.
I lead training sessions for workers
about managing aggression and violence but
I hate it hate it.
It is a result of surges of emotion taking over the human.
Fear, insecurity, anger alongside lack of emotional intelligence.

We do it too,when we snap back at the persons we love.
It comes out of the same place.
It is built up in tribes, gangs, crowds and Nations too.
Lord have mercy.

We have much to do.
We have so much loving to do.

If we are not part of the solution
we are
part of the problem.

Sunday, February 21, 2021



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WORKING WITH GROUPS - building a climate of trust.

When it comes to talking about feelings,
touching on any sense of 
emotional interior activity -
often the shutters come down.

Most will walk up to a Blob Tree,
on a big screen, and place a sticker
where they are/ describing how they are feeling non-verbally - 
then they often won't talk about their feelings - but this is still a step forward.

Emotional literacy is about being able
to express feelings with words.
Not just 'happy' or 'sad'.
Every feeling comes under those headings.

The Blob Teenage cards get them talking.
Talking about how the Blobs are feeling.
It is a forward step to be able to say how a Blob is feeling.
The Blob Jigsaw gets them active
but struggle to respond to questions.

The best methods I have discovered
is to show slices out of a movie.
This engages them, moves them,
stirs their feelings and then they spill.
All depending how free/insecure they are.
All depending how chained they are
by their own peers. + depending on the climate of trust in the room.

If I can get them to write something
about themselves - wondrous
= self revelation spills.

Out of older groups I get these::
"Today I told someone I was bullied at school."
"I don't want to be in a comfort zone -
I want to make a difference."

Sometimes, if the climate of trust is good,
usually when I am with a group for 24 hours,
there are stories of abuse, beatings, rejection informally spilled,
alcoholic Parents - self harm and more.

How do I get through with the 'hard to reach'?
That's what I need to spend time on this.

If we don't let these things out,
these last words is for you,
they don't reside in your gut dead,
they are buried alive and will come back
to haunt you.
In body
In mind
In spirit
In dysfunctional relationships
because the person who is relating to you
is only building a relationship
with your shell -
not the real beautiful thing.
You are beautiful -
even more without the MASKS.


Then they came for me .....

Saturday, February 20, 2021

We had been married for one year and THEN this !!!!!!!!!


Joan was 21, I was 26 when we sold up, burned bridges, and moved to live & work in a Young Offenders Unit as Houseparents.

It was a school by name but - really an education prison for young boys 14 to 17. All from Manchester.

We had been married for one year and then this !!!!!!!!!

(I am on my laptop.

I am expecting a knock on the door by Joy. 
She was born in this unit place.
Joy our first child born with 15 ready made teenage 'brothers'.)


It was the start of our journey - break away from home town to
follow the 

risk failure
inability turning to competence - well ....

..... not so much the competence.

Before this job, I was working at Pilkington Glass in their Research Laboratory.
They used to call me 'the Rocking Vicar' because I was always singing as I worked.

I want to write about our above work. Yet it so sensitive. 
I have lots of letters from these boys/men by now methinks letters I would love to share - some powerful stories too.

I wanted to reflect today on other mission experiences as I have shared over the last two days. Reflecting on the work/mission we was engaged in. It is delicate - so many stories I can't spill.

This was 1965 and all that ...................... how can that be? - me being a teenager still ..!!