It soon would change...........
Everyone gathered
handshakes
smiles
greetings
a hug or two
but it soon would change.
After an introduction
and a few starter
getting everyone talking
first in small groups
then in plenary
everyone had spoken
self revealed
relaxed -
but it soon would change.
I was about to create a structured experience
reverse empathy
an experiential learning exercise
starting with comfortable humans -
but it soon would change.
I had them sharing in small groups
about conflict experienced in their lives
about aggression faced in their jobs
about things which had happened outside the training room -
but soon things would change.
Intimacy in small groups
active listening
bodies leaning forward in empathetic posture
faces still with attentive tension -
but it soon would change.
A structured experience
guided sharing
attention to real listening
specific brief
about their own experiences -
but it soon would change.
I gather them in a large group
asking for no words to be spoken
structured silence and
I brief them to become
another human
who they had heard -
but soon - so soon, we are about to change.
"I am 'name', naming another human,
I faced violence when.............."
and a real, so real story was told -
reality entered the room.
One heard another retell a vivid story.
One became responsible to tell a story which was not theirs.
All did this ..........
......... and changed had begun.
Afterwards - still in silence
I asked for their feelings
powerful empathetic words spilled
powerful supportive words
powerful non verbal expressions of privilege
wonder
and the change was happening.
I halted the silence and asked for reflections
dialogue
serious faces stumbled out words of respect
hesitant, cautious phrases offered explicit words
of comfort
of love
of support
of empathy
We had experienced something we will never forget
and it had been, still was, a changing experience.
The group had all experienced violence to the person
from a 'one on one' attack
to death of a family member with a gun.
Being in a 'scared to death' situation with hammers being used
Being fearful of their own survival.
Now we can start from reality, to work at moving from awareness to skills. Skills to provide tools in the life toolbox to enable the worker to better deal with a conflict situation. Firstly not making the incident escalate. The being better able to manage self and calm the explosion from another.
It is over. I am left drained from the experience. The word 'privilege' stays in my gut from the day.
"We only see human behaviour - we never see a human's experience"
Unless there is a structured opportunity to share like this, important experiences remain unknown. We see behaviour but we don't hear the story.
So many explosive humans, aggressive humans, tortured humans, emotionally torn humans have stories untold. Damage untold. Abuse untold.
Privilege
today
privilege.
.
.
