I been in a cave
For forty days
Only a spark
To light my way
I wanna give out
I wanna give in
This is our crime
This is our sin

But I still believe
I still believe
Through the pain
And the grief
Through the lives
Through the storms
Through the cries
And through the wars
Oh, I still believe

Flat on my back
Out at sea
Hopin' these waves
Don't cover me
I'm turned and tossed
Upon the waves
When the darkness comes
I feel the grave

But I still believe
I still believe
Through the cold
And through heat
Through the rain
And through the tears
Through the crowds
And through the cheers
Oh, I still believe

I'll march this road
I'll climb this hill
Upon on my knees if I have to
I'll take my place
Up on this stage
I'll wait 'til the end of time
for you like everybody else

I'm out on my own
Walkin' the streets
Look at the faces
That I meet
I feel like I Like I want to go home
What do I feel
What do I know

But I still believe
I still believe
Through the shame
And through the grief
Through the heartache
Through the tears
Through the waiting
Through the years

For people like us
In places like this
We need all the hope
That we can get
Oh, I still believe

One of my favouritw tracks
EVER
I still believe
by The Call

Teenagers killed in London in 2010

The death of a 17-year-old on a Peckham housing estate has brought the toll of teenagers killed in the capital in 2010 to 19

• guardian.co.uk, Thursday 30 December 2010 18.40 GMT

..... great Blog here/great great Lyric wow

Lyric Of The Day 28.12.10 from All My Favourite People by Over the Rhine

“All my friends are part saint and part sinner

We lean on each other

Try to rise above

We’re not afraid to admit that we’re all still beginners

We’re all late bloomers

When it comes to love

All my favourite people are broken

Believe me

My heart should know

Orphaned believers, sceptical dreamers

Step forward

You can stay right here

You don’t have to go.”

From All My Favourite People by Over The Rhine

Thank you Stocki
http://stocki.typepad.com/soulsurmise/2010/12/lyric-of-the-day-281210-from-all-my-favourite-people-by-over-the-rhine.html

Synopsis of the Radio Programme I quote from here/churns my soul.

Nelson Mandela wrote a letter every day of his life. He also wrote diaries, kept notebooks, scratched out ideas for speeches and doodled his thoughts and meditations on scraps of paper.

In this programme Fergal Keane takes a journey through this special archive, which was bequeathed to the Nelson Mandela Foundation in 2009 and published by Macmillan in the book 'Conversations With Myself' in October 2010.

The archive reveals surprises, painful reminders and unanswered questions and offers insight into the experiences which led to Mandela's daily disciplines, life lessons and to the moral and political vision which inspired and continues to inspire so many.

We hear the voice of someone who is communicating not necessarily to a particular audience but who is laying out his personal thoughts. We are also given snatches of audio archive - conversations between Mr Mandela and one of his closest friends and colleagues, Ahmed Kathrada speaking on a range of subjects from lessons on how to fire a rifle, to Tracy Chapman.

We hear Mandela's reflections as an activist with the ANC in the 1960s. We hear his voice at the moment he is told he will be sent to Robben Island, and in more personal moments, recalling dreams about his wife Winnie and his children, during his years apart from his family. We hear diary excerpts written on the night of his release from Pollsmoor in February 1990, and drafts of his very early speeches as leader of the ANC. And we hear extracts from letters and diaries written during his years in retirement, as he observes the ongoing political struggles of his country.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00wr4j3

I am excited.
This book
a collection of doodles
speaking drafts
thoughts
experiences
meditations.

I thought - I do that
I am always scribbling
always exploring interior self.

I am excited about
about reading this
for the coming months
it will take me on a journey
towards my interior.
Discovery
journey

I will let you know how I get on
on my Blog
and drips
on
Twitter
Facebook
too ...........

So so so
what do you do now?

Pip Wisdom ‎*
"Your problem
is how you are going to spend
this one and precious life
you have been issued.

Christmas is over
the family gone home
the nation is on holiday?

What do I do?
When I am not gigging
I am working at home
I disappear into my office
always things to catch up on
or - more important than that!

As well ....
I don't feel like working -
but feelings I say
(you say?)
...... do I give them a holiday too?

Me and Mrs Beautiful
had a meeting this morning
looking at diary
three months ahead
her bits
my bits
but we decided to go out this week
Twice!

Yes out, without a reason
other than getting out.
Bluewater/MallMassive near here - NO
I saw the lines of traffic yesterday
M2 + M25 + A2 = screaming queues !!

We plan to walk
and bus/drive to another.
All seems strange.

Over Christmas - it was great to be with the the family
all together -
busy life prevents that often.
Connie was an extra - first one for her.
Also first for me as a Granddad !

Most of us have memories of Grandparents at Christmas.
Some remember pain/stress/tension/drunkenness ++++
Others remember
good feelings
playing with cousins and relatives from a distance -
geographically or relationally.

Strange thing
we are now those Grandparent.
We have no parents ourselves now
we have been left stranded
in the gray hair zone -
in my case SILVER !

One day we won't be there.
One day we will be remembered.
I would hate to be remembered
as an oppressor.
I know there has been times in my life
when Christmas has come at me
when I have been stressed as hell.
Uncomfortable and not at ease in my skin.

I was always at odds with Christmas.
It was incompatible with my faith.
Glitter superficiality
No room at the Inn for my faith.
I felt compromised by it all.
Pressured to conform.

That spills on others.
As the family CEO especially !

Others I know have had/having tough times NOW !
I would love to click about some of them
but that would break confidentiality.

We had a good time
We supplied a BIG BIG Lancashire Hotpot
for the Christmas Eve - the best you can have!
Joy and PTG hosting with wonderment on 'the Day'
as we did on Boxing Day.

Right now I am avoiding football on TV.
I am clicking
and listening to Kenny Everett captured
from two BBC radio programmes
via Audio Hijack - and keeping forever.
The most entertaining Jock EVER !!

Back in the 70's
and 80's - I captured him
on cassette on
Radio London, Pirate station, BBC Radio
and then Capital Radio in London.
Fantastic funny extreme radio
You can listen now for a few days
via BBC iPlayer see these links::
http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00wp5hz
http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00wqflj

Another programme,
there is some great radio at the moment,
is Mandela - all about his private thoughts::
"Nelson Mandela wrote a letter every day of his life.
He also wrote diaries, kept notebooks,
scratched out ideas for speeches and doodled his thoughts
and meditations on scraps of paper."
That what I do - so I ordered the Book!
Radio Link here::
http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00wr4j3
Excited human here .......

(puzzle of the Day for you)
There is only one human
in the world
who knows why I have had
5xDVD of the film 'Annie'
delivered here to Wilson Mansions
(puzzle of the Day for you?)

Christmas Present Highlights
2xUnderpants Black
2xScarves long/short
2xCD's Jay Z/Kanye West.
Hip Hop Happy !

.

.¸¸♥¸.•*¨*•♪Christmas♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥¸.•*¨*•♪Greetings♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥with¸.•*¨*•♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥¸.•*¨*•♪all♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥¸.•*¨*•♪the LOVE♫•*¨*•.¸I have¸♥¸.•*¨*•♪and♫•*¨*•.¸available¸♥¸.•*¨*•and♪♫•*¨*•.because of¸¸♥¸.•*¨*•♪Christmas♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥¸.•*¨*•

-- Post From My iPhone

The police called at my student hovel early evening,

but I didn't answer

as I thought they'd come to evict me.

I hadn't paid my rent in months.

But then I got to thinking:

my mum hadn't been too good

and what if it was something about her?

READ THIS

CONTINUED .....HERE....

Christmas - a reflection
I observed
young humans behaving.

* He was drunk.
He came up behind the little guy
and smacked him hard,
simultaneously with both palms
around the ears.
He then abused and threatened the other three
as they sat eating and socializing.
He was bigger,
alcohol influenced and
with three non-aggressive young men.
As drunk as he was –
he chose not to project this behaviour
on the big tougher guys only a few yards away.

We wish you a Merry Christmas and a………
………place this alongside the TV News
and ask in this context
“who is the Palestinian?
who the Israeli?”

* The big guy shouted loud at everyone around.
Helping self to three desserts seemed right to him.
As his palms opened,
the fingers extended like spikes.
Like his tone of voice – like his loudness,
he is big and strong and tall and
yet his life skills have developed
along a certain limited behavioural line.

“Joy to the World”.
Doesn’t this happen between nations,
races, cultures,
staff teams,
individuals in one-to-one?

“Sorrow and love flow mingled down”
This was said of the real Founder of
my life
as he was crucified –
the horrible necessity
and purpose of all
that was to follow
his Christmas birth.

I have heard that between birth and five years of age,
the average child receives 431 negative messages
every day.

* get down
* don’t do that
* be quiet
* no
* look at the state of you
* …………….off you little……………
* you have got dirt on our………….
* don’t touch

So………..we repress our feelings because
‘We feel’ they are unacceptable to others
and the mask comes in handy in the staff meeting.
We can pretend we have it ‘all together’
behind the mask!
The mask helps to protect us
from the negatives in daily life.
Yes – in your places
- as you know.

Seeing behind the behaviour,
the mask,
the army uniform-----------------
-----------------------I see a beautiful human
who Jesus was born for and…………
………… (fill in yourself bit)


“ We are sick as we are secret”
- John Berryman


As the violence and the loudness,
the oppression,
the killing at home or abroad – happens
I have decided to make my life an act of love.

Let us join the vulnerable babe this
Christmas.
Maskless vulnerability.

So love can get in.
So love can get out.