Mark Leedham - Sprinter

WWW.BORNTODOTHIS.COM

I clicked this pic as I got back to London following my time in rural Northern Ireland .......... and I saw a couple kissing on the escalator ..... and I don't like MacRubbish ........ and we had hell of a good Greenbelt meeting on Monday and we will have Daniel Bedingfield at the festival this year ....... and he used to beg me to dance on The Rolling Magazine Stage when he was a a wee boy ....... and I have tried to listen........ to words and ... ...... silence and music and my soul and .. ..... have tried to love and ...........I am delighted that Emma and Paul Angel are getting wed and it clashes with a gig I have in my diary and I am sad - for me ..... and I have thought of such a good idea I am dying to tell you but later .... and I must publish the latest email I have got from U2land ... ........ and I notice I have a different energy than I had on day off .............. AND Joyshe is in South Africa working and I miss her but it was great to have Annshe dropping in .....

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...... I said last week that I would have a day off this week and we did catch - at last - the Johnny Cash movie.
Was good.
It showed him to be a mashed up 'human being'
who struggled with being a 'human becoming'.
Who are we to talk -
we have our 'beautiful imperfection' - eh?

If you have not seen it - it was the best film, for me, that I have seen in more than a year.
If you have thirsty emotions - why not try it?
I am not big at going to the movies but lovemlovem.

It was about relationships and some deep ones and broken ones.
The drugs did not help JC but neither did his Dad.
Boy - parents have a responsibility when it comes to being oppressive - or not.
NOT
Please.
Grown ups can be really hard work - leaning towards damage!

When I have a day of - I often go emotionally flat.
Day-off 5 words to describe my life went something like this ::

downtime
futuring
sweetsour
imagineering
quiet

Beautiful human daughter Annshe called tonight with a wee team from Pimp My Ride. Joan was watching West Ham on the TV with her mate Eve. I was clicking d mac.
They were passing through East London on their way to Pimp someone's motor. So they dropped off for a cuppa tea. I was telling Tim Westwood about how I record him every week direct from Radio One - via Audio Hijack - to iTunes - to iPod - to my ears - in Underground d tube. I don't know anyone else who does this and he was interested. Tim does a hip-hop show every Saturday and Friday - as well as presenting 'Pimp my MTV Ride'.



I have so much to do and the pile seems to - well - er - PILE!!



but

you are beautiful

so stay beautiful



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.... with permission from Mike .... I just love getting a little email out-a-d-blue ........

Hi Pip

You don't know me. Me and my friends used to be Greenbelt regulars in the 90s and we've seen your Rolling Magazine a fair few times! One of those friends just sent me a link to your website and it's brought back many positive memories.

Never got a chance to speak to you, which is a shame. Wanted to say thank you for what you did there, for giving us the opportunity see life from a different perspective, for entertaining, but most of all for making us think. I'm not going to claim you've turned my life around (it was never very broken!), but even 15 years on I still regard the Greenbelt experience as a major influence in my development. And you certainly were a part of that, so thanks!

Time is a strange thing isn't it? 15 years is in some ways forever and in others, a blink. Seems like not long ago when I was sitting in a Greenbelt field watching some band called Chagall Guevera. What a night!

Then I think about what I've done since then. Then I notice that time seems to speed up as you get older. Then I think that the next 15 years will feel as long as the last 9, and before I know it I'll be 70! A good reason not to waste the now, eh?! I'm trying to do the things I'd do if I were given 2 years to live (without being too reckless of course). This mainly translates to putting the love of my life before my career, riding a bike, taking a few risks, travelling... and not worrying too much!

I think you're a good bloke Pip, much loved! If you ever find yourself near Loughborough, there's a cup to tea waiting for you. Or a pint if you'd prefer!

Yours,

Mike

(and on behalf of Stu, Paul, Andy, Lee)
Greenbelts 91 - 98

I have felt vulnerable a few times in the past week.
I don't like feeling these feelings.
Short medium or long term.
But I do feel them and sometimes I have an aftertaste from them
like the after effects of eating a kipper.
I don't like those feelings but,
as with kipper aftertaste,
I recognise them,
and take the indigestion tablet
or other symptom relief.

Feeling symptom relief ::
1 I do a swot with myself
2 I write to myself - and you - if you have thirsty eyes and ears
3 Talking it out with a L5 friend is so wondrously offloading
4 Reading stuff which stimulates, grows in me, stretches my yearning.
Amen.






.......... you are beautiful ......

.... SOMETIMES ...
sometimes we have to focus
priorities to prepare
give all
go away
work
strain
hard
focus
priorities
return and rejoice
re envigarate
re create
relax
hard
be free to do that
Nelson M says
'we are free to be free'
it don't come easy
it needs working on
freedom is a road
not a one-off turn of a key
journey
red lights
stops
blind alleys
hills
slopes
hitchers
a ditch or two
or more
low on gas
a refill
music
oh
music
sun on the face
breath in the nostrils
eyes shining
eyes wide open
smell d flowers
hmmmmmmm
Freedom
the freedom road
the road less travelled


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QUOTE ::::::
I have learned
through bitter experience
the one supreme lesson
to conserve my anger,
and as heat conserved
it is transmuted into energy,
even so our anger
controlled
can be transmuted
into a power
that can move the world.



- Mahatma Gandhi

I want to Quote ::


Quotes are inspirational for me.
They scratch the surface of my soul, jerk the mind - and give me thirsty ears..


They seem to drill a well into my awareness and prise open my blinkers.
Thanx for reading this ……...

"The first duty of love is to listen."
Paul Tillich

... at Belfast Airport ......... I always seem to have to wait for 3 or 4 hours but better be early than late ...

Was ..... have been ....... helping to lead a week-end residential for 41 beautiful humans.
I was the only man.
There was about 15 Mums and four Staff and the rest were energetic kids of all ages.
There was loads to do for everyone ::

Banana Boat
Go Kart racing
Climbing walls
Speed boat riding
and a massive space within the grounds to
howl around and play outside the urban context.

They are the basic facts.

Was really good for all the children and adults. One basic objective was to get them all together in a safe environment and to build relationships with staff and each other. It was a start in someway because some of the staff had not met some of the Mums.

Stand out for me was one particular session which I led for the Adults. It was me and them together for the first time - other than the informal contact during a few short hours before that. I wanted them to begin to trust me so I tried to get all talking and gently eased them into sharing with a Blob Tree postcard in hand - an aid to catch eye and a better focus than looking at me, wringing their own hands or examining fingernails. It was me asking them all in turn to express, first of all, a simple level of sharing.
I felt, as we progressed, I needed to seek their attention regarding their own listening. I drew their attention on each occasion that one 'spoke over' one another. Using a few other Blob Tools - I sensed that they were ready ........... sensing a climate of trust present.
I led them into looking beyond the blobs to thinking and voicing their observation about their own housing estate - the strengths and the weaknesses.

There was the most powerful voicing of facts opinions and feelings. And, most wondrously, a powerful awareness which was demonstrated by their listening ....... and the silence that was delivered around the words uttered by each lone speaker in turn ....... WOW.
There was tears too. Not from sadness but from realisation that they had articulated something that was churning around inside their souls - words unspoken - words unheard - words and feelings that had never been made concrete to the unique self or any other human.

At the beginning, I was easing words from most reluctant lips.
At the middle phase they were rolling and .....
..... at the end I couldn't shut them up!!

Quotes ::
"The taxi drivers don't want to take me to our estate"
"The curtains in our community hall are the same ones for 20 years"
"The impact of coming into our estate is terrible - it looks so bad as a first impression"
"Private houses being built around us is making it more obvious that we are being neglected"
"People don't know about the good parts of us as they just hear about the reputation"
"I have never had a chance to talk to anyone about my feelings before"
"I have never spoke in front of a whole group of people before"
"This helps us to understand each other so much better"

My objectives included ::
Building a climate of trust in the group and it continuing afterwards.
Encouraging self revelation - an understanding of their interior self.
Developing their self awareness and those around them.
Build confidence.
Creating a group time which would be experiential
- one they could remember and refer back to as they thought about life or talked about the week-end.
Stretching them gently, in facilitation, to enable them to step outside their comfort zones and to encourage them to chose sensitively to grow along the road less travelled.
For me to grow in all these things too ............... and I say all objectives were achieved .............. thanx to their generosity of spirit.

Feeling
ACCEPTABLE
is a powerful
feeling

Could click more words here ...... maybe I will ...... but I will certainly post some photos in the coming days ........




and .....


I wonder where you are ::
Geographically
Thought processes
Soul
Your spirit
Stretching
Zones
Confidence
Yearnings
Wonder
Blinking
Seeing eyes or - unseeing eyes
Breathing


bBeautiful ...............

"work like you don't need the money
dance like no-one is watching
sing like no-one is listening
and
love like you have never been hurt"

.... I am gone to here .....

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.... the largest activity centre in Ireland, welcoming over 10,000 visitors annually. .......works for the inclusion of disabled and non disabled people. .... do this by providing opportunities for all to participate in a wide range of educational, recreational and creative arts programmes.

.... will be online if possible .....

Thanx for being there - here ...... I appreciate the click .......
......................you are beautiful ......



The next human you see is Beautiful too ........

bhpDiddy

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