Thursday, May 19, 2011


Home is where the heart is.

Watched a TV programme tonight
about homeless humans.
Four of them
placed in 'celebrity' homes!
Not the best way of helping
especially when a camera is following you.

It was programme 2 of 3.
Three male, one female.
The young woman was from a YMCA
supporting housing project and
she returned there after the 'living away' experience.
It ends next week.

I could say lots about it.
Ghandi comes to mind -
when he was asked about his tough life
'What was the hardest thing you experienced?'
and he said
'The hard heartedness of the educated.'

Not that all the celebs were hard
bu there was one particular man,
ex bassist in the band Blur,
who was particularly insensitive
and hardhearted it seems to me.

Some others did really well.
Others struggled.
Others loved.Stumbled.
Wept.
felt ...............

I identify with the latter.
I felt deeply about the struggle with alcohol
the empty faces of one lost in life -
no anchor.
Carrying weights
from those who had not loved them
others who had failed to love
and
those unable to love them.

I feel so much with them.
I have been there with them
over many years
striving and struggling
weeping and fearing
(as I do now)
for those who are on the edge.

I feel it now as I click.
The desperation of not coping
leaning on chemical or legal can of liquid.
No energy
from a life of let-downs.

I am not angry at those who were hard at times.
I am in pain for the wounded.
Their struggle.

It triggers me about the alcohol -
a young man in my life
unable to stay off the juice
and then he walked in front of a bus.
The loss of a life.
We spoke regularly
he joked all the time
to cover his pain
to cover his life in a cull de sac.

The YMCA came out well in the TV prograamme.
Thank you Sutton Coldfield YMCA
you did us proud.
So many such places
daily ................. DAILY
dealing with humans like this
loving humans like these.

It is hard for any neglected
or abused child
to grow as a balanced adult.
The rest of us struggle
(some are better at pretending)
Others need much consistent love
and
need a village/community to grow a child.

'Life is difficult'
says M Scott Peck
(the first 3 words in his book
'The Road Less Travelled'.)

Watch the programme on the ITV Player
if you can.
Allow it to tear your guts out.
http://www.itv.com/itvplayer/video/?Filter=239830