Friday, February 15, 2019

"You are beautiful" I would say when the language was viciously disgusting.

I started to say to people 

'You are Beautiful' 

back in 1980.

I started to say to people
'You are Beautiful'
back in 1980.

It was part of a poem I wrote back then.

I have always recorded/reflected on my life & work.
My writing & books have all come from 
Living stuff.
Doing stuff.
Learning stuff
and writing stuff to help me understand.

Reflective practice - late night mostly.
Not being able to sleep until
I got things out on paper.
By writing - I learn.

I have notes going back further than 40 years.
When I was 26 & residential in a Young Offenders unit.
A House-Father to 15 teenage boys. 

When led a team working in a community
with bikers very present, every day & often late nights ......

When I worked in a hostel learning to love those in special need.
Running programmes which excited & engaged - often late night.
Bands, gigs, sports, week-ends away in remote locations.
Late night 121's

When I worked closely with gang members.
Group work = Gang work.
Living with violence & aggression.
Walking the edge.
Writing 'prose' - (someone once told me).

"You are beautiful" I would say
when the language was viciously disgusting.
You are beautiful
midst gangs armed with weapons to preparing to do damage to others.
You are beautiful
working with individuals with guns.
You are beautiful
facing uncontrollable rage & uncontrolled emotional streaming.

To be able to work with those displaying a range of behaviours & language
I had to learn to see through their behaviour 
to reach out to the hurting / wounded / scared / life-unskilled beautiful humans.

I am still learning here.
I still /see /hear /feel /negative FIRST before I can reach out & through
to the human & connect with their feelings driving their behaviour. 

You are beautiful ........
You may not agree with me
You may not like me
You may not respect me
You may have seen me at my worst
You may not want to get closer ..........

But I believe & want to work it out
why you are beautiful
why am I beautiful 
(the latter was only thrust upon me 
at the same time as I saw/felt your BEAUTIFUL.)