Tuesday, November 27, 2018

It all comes out of the Hard Drive in our head = the Brain. Emotions travel faster to the HD than the thought process. More-so in adolescence.

It all comes out of the Hard Drive
in our head = the Brain. 
Emotions travel faster to the HD than the thought process. 
More-so in adolescence.
In certain situations the anger fades quickly.
Others live with it for much longer.
I believe and experience many humans
becoming aware and skilled in this area
Emotional Intelligence can be developed.

My work with groups is a challenge.
Not only do I aim to communicate
but I aim to create an environment and opportunity for everyone there to communicate.
Yes listening!
Yes verbally and non-verbally
expressing themselves

In my own life I know that managing emotions needs
continuous opportunities to articulate them with others.

Many professionals struggle with their own emotions
including anger management. in their work and private lives.
Five significant Anger Management tips from the incomplete me are::

1 Every time you feel a feeling, give it a name.
This may sound strange because we have feelings every milli-second but I am referring to the feelings which stand out from the crowd.
The special pleasant one and more important, the not so nice one.
This act of naming feelings will develop emotional literacy
- inner you, the important you. 
The emotionally literate you.

2 Capture the strength of a feeling when you feel it.
Hold it in your hand so to speak.
Note it. Speak it or at least write it down. 
Use it as a tool. 
A learning tool.
Try not to control it,
suppress it,
but manage it.

3 Give special attention to the anger, jealousy, envy and negative feelings generally.
Turn the emotion inside-out to examine it.
Take it by the throat and use the energy to understand it. 
Reverse it into a positive feeling - use it.
Do something with it.
When I watch a movie or TV and see a fictitious character, or a real life person, whose behaviour or attitude I don't like, I ask why? 
Why don't I? 
What are my feelings?
What is the behaviour? 
Why is this person behaving this way? 
I am taking the energy from my own emotions and using it.

4 If you only spend time with humans just like yourself
- same social strata,
it will be harder to develop emotionally.
Deliberately spend time with those who are different. 
The more extreme the better.
Do the above with them. 
Learn from them.
Working with 'the hard to reach' is a great challenge but massive in terms of learning.
5 All feelings are yours - not another persons.
Feelings inside you are yours.
"He made me feel angry" cannot be a correct statement because nobody makes us feel. 
They come from inside us. 
We feel. 
They behave. 
They have attitudes.

Both ends of the spectrum can stimulate our feelings. 
And - they, family, friends, colleagues, clients –
in helping relationships
need humans in their lives who are getting to grips with their own
emotions - including ANGER.
This is where I am at.
Not complete. 
On a journey. 
Join me?
Please take at least one thought away from my reflections. 
Consider what you plan to do with that seed.
Feedback and your reflections - always welcome

"Hope has two beautiful daughters. 
Their names are anger and courage; 
anger at the way things are,
and courage to see that
they do not remain the way they are."  

Augustine of Hippo