Saturday, October 18, 2008

When we have been away, Zig comes and sits on my knee, Mac and, because he has missed Joan so much, he sits on her knee. We have been away due to the sudden death of Joan's Mum. Now we must depart again for the funeral and the necessary details around it.

Sunday we are away again and Zig, even with friendly neighbours, will be without his mates again. We go 'up north' for the funeral. Monday I am working in Leeds, Tuesday is preparing for the Wednesday funeral. Thursday is clear up.
I guess that we will never sleep there again - this house where Joan lived as a child, the same street where I was born and met this attractive girl playing in the park.

It is closure for us in many ways.
That is the word both of us agree on.
We feel that.
The rest of the feelings are a bit mushy. Here am I - working hard at this feeling stuff, somewhat confused about my feelings. I feel a bit spaced. Not motivated. Aware that I want to tackle all the jobs around me - yet I am non-functiono (I once saw that on the side of a broken coffee machine in Italy!)

I will be a non attendee at work this coming week. I feel a bit bad about it. I accept that I have to be away from regular life.

I will try to blog during the next week. I will not have the convenience of wireless and broadband - but I will blog on my iPhone. As usual, I will click feelings and maybe not so much detail because so much of it belongs to other beautiful humans. I guess some days later, I will be in a fit state to reflect better on life.
Reality is interesting to me - and death is part of that for all of us sometimes.

Be beautiful - I am trying. (and I just love the music being played on this blog RIGHT NOW - love it love it.