Tuesday, November 18, 2008

I am feeling ................... I am feeling all the time as we all do.
I am feeling ok but a wee bit tense about all the things I need to do and don't feel like doing.
Do you ever feel like that?

Of course, not feeling like doing - is a feeling too.
It is about the motivational stuff too.
My Myers Briggs type says I am motivated by the immediate.
I spark with the immediate.
Especially humans - that is a spark to light my fire.

My office is uninspiring.
So is
My inbox, articles to write, papers to read, but the pressure is on to prep gigs is motivating.
These are really important as I will be leading humans into experiences of development.
Baby light my fire.

Tense
Futurology
Passionate
Learning
Churning .............. these are the five words to describe my life at the moment - and you?

I want to introduce you to a human who is beautiful.
'I am vulnerable' this person says.
Their life described triggers my internal horror.
I keep a steady expression and facial muscles.
I look steadily into their face.
Not staring, not piercing, but loving loving.
That is what I feel.
It always shows if we love.
A face does not lie.

I see a tormented face.
Tears are flowing.
Shaking lips.
I say
'you are beautiful'
'I appreciate you telling me this'.

I want to hug but it is not appropriate.
I am desperate not to be directive.
I am sensitive to the powerlessness.
I am feeling the desperation.
The desire for love - not violence.
The desire for love - not abuse.
The desire for love not just sex delivered 'on tap'.

The feelings need to be expelled.
Then a more settled exchange.
I am able to ask questions.
Probe a sensitive consideration of options,
whilst at the same time,
avoiding directing to the obvious decisions to make.

Then a way becomes clear.
By asking questions - so gentle,
a more settled soul fumbles to consider.
There is always someone who the person feels better with
than others.
That is the step. That is the journey out of pain.
As always, the symptoms are painful,
but the solutions are below the iceberg surface.
These need the attention.
One big step is to know
"I am beautiful"
UNTIL THEN
it takes another to believe for them
with them
and tell it
show it
live it
Dear Lord I pray .......................