Thursday, November 15, 2018

Asking you a question. The deeper you.  πŸ…±πŸ…΄πŸ…°πŸ†„πŸ†ƒπŸ…ΈπŸ…΅πŸ†„πŸ…»  you.

I was working / living with teens & behaviour that was hitting my life hard. 
I could see their behaviour but not their journey - 
their inner being. 
I had to change & see their beautiful 
despite behaviour & started saying it to them.

Seeing through behaviour beyond beyond ....
God loves these beautiful humans & need to - 
but not love their behaviour. 

#YouAreBeautiful changed my everything towards them but ..
I had to turn it ALSO to myself. 
I must be beautiful too
Not what the mirror says
The scales say
My feelings say sometimes. 
I knew God loved me when I was 21 but 
I did to accept my own beautiful.  
No love for self. 
That’s when I became an adult. 

A new beautiful view insight philosophy mission. 

I have just been in Berlin for 3 days & everyone I have asked this question  ..... there was pause 
+Digging Deep 
& they answered. 

I understand that people don’t want to go online/ public with an answer but
I believe it is good for our soul to dig. 
It is different for everyone. 
No one says 18

From a train home bound.


In Berlin - a big experience for me & all

Saturday, November 10, 2018

LOVE that one person you will spend the rest of your life with

What keeps you awake? 

The things that keep us awake, 
will you have a go at that?

Are they sometimes the things 
that we bury alive?

Buried alive!! 
Some life experiences are buried alive.
So we wrap them up into parcels and push them deep into our soul. 

These things are not buried dead. 
They are alive inside us. 
These things are buried alive and 
they stay alive and hurt drain emotional energy 
active inside 

These little packages ..... or bigger, 
are like parcels all wrapped up with 
string and selotape. 
They are buried because they are uncomfortable to live with - handle - manage. 
They all need to be pulled out and opened up. 
Examined and dealt with. 
Then they can be buried dead. 
Not inside us alive. 

Talk with someone.
Please don't keep them deep in your gut.
You will be drained.
Maybe enough to make life NOT worth living.

You are beautiful.
You can turn this bad stuff around.
But we all need to get stuff out


love like you have never been hurt 
LOVE that one person you will spend
the rest of your life with =
you ..................................


Wednesday, November 07, 2018

All voted in - thank you America -YouAreBeautiful

Blob Tree Tools - a great and popular POSTER - Emotional Literacy for everyone


An adlolescent needs to abandon the family ......

For much of my life I have worked as my mission in life with Young People on the edge or over the edge in terms of their offending behaviour. Beautiful humans.

Working with gangs has been a big stretch and also a massive learning.
I strive continually to understand violence and aggression to help me to be better able to be in a helping relationship with these BHP’s.

A Youth Club as often been the base of operations. Where contact is first made.
Where relationships commence and then ……..
Branches off that base have been events outside the club life. 
Such as residential experiences in the wilds of the country - or evening or day trips in the mini-bus AGAIN to build relationships as well as extend their life experiences.
Group work conducted strategically has been a major part of developmental work for me and the teams I have led.

I want to take you into an experience that still lives in my soul - 
join me ………


It had always been normal for many of our teenage boys to carry knives. 
One club evening we noticed other ‘tools‘ beginning to be smuggled into the club. 
Sticks, some with nails protruding, iron bars and hammers. 
At the same time sticks, stones and bottles were being hidden outside the building ready for the end of the club evening. 
The gang was preparing for battle.

One older age  gang, late teens, numbered only a few at this stage. 
Much work had been done with them over the years: their own Sunday club with their own bank account, holidays, weekends, many court appearances. 
Now they came to the club irregularly. 
The younger gang, up and coming powerhouse - aged around 15 - 18, were maturing and were now less disruptive, 
but well prepared to do battle with the hyperactive, disruptive, violent older gang. 
It was becoming a regular occurrence for them to attack and bait each other concluding in a street battle at club closing time with sticks, bricks and bottles being thrown.

It became so bad that we shut club completely for ten days to cool off. Never ever done before.

One evening, as the workers met to discuss the strategy for the future, the meeting was ‘steamed’. 
Forty or so kids came in and all of a sudden it became a gang meeting with two older boys taking the chair between them. 
I facilitated the meeting but in no way was I in control. 
First of all they berated me and the other workers for running a lousy club – “you can’t handle it” – and then they turned on the other gang and ran their own kangaroo court.

After the slagging off came the verdict. “Stay away,” said the older gang leader, 
“Stay away for a year from now. 
You’re barred and if you roll up you’re nicked!” 

That was authority speaking, and the workers’ meeting that eventually took place that evening affirmed that decision. 
The younger gang were barred from the club for a year, the first time that a long-term suspension had been imposed. 
It wasn’t left like that, but we decided to work with the gang outside the club. 
Not reject them but, with love and commitment, intensify our youth work with them.

Two of our team members were chosen to head up the group work with me in support. 
One of our volunteer youth workers was in his late twenties, a working-class Londoner who came to us from a drug rehabilitation centre and a natural for making warm contact with the kids. 
Another worker, a total contrast from a middle-class background and was studying to be a doctor. Both had a keen sense of humour, resilience under pressure and lots of enthusiasm. 

So we commenced a Group work programme for this gang and several others including girl gangs.
Each had a maximum of eight in their group and two volunteer group workers, the same workers only. 
The same youth members only..
They met only in the mini-bus and/or the group room separate from the Youth Club.

The objectives were designed to give each group a place and a sense of security including conditions to form closer and developmental relationships. A sense of belonging was developed in each group because there was a climate of trust and participation.

The story rolls on and has much more details in my books.
But the group work method was a major break through. Negative turned into positives. 
I became a group worker.
I believe in groups.
I belong to a group.
I yearn to belong.
I believe that for you too - and all humankind …………


Monday, November 05, 2018

TROUBLE UP NORTH and it’s no joke.

and it’s no joke. 

There has been a "profoundly concerning" rise in early deaths from accidents, suicide, alcohol misuse, smoking, cancer and drug addiction in the north of England, deepening the north-south divide, research has found. 

Socioeconomic deprivation has led to a particularly sharp rise in deaths among 25- to 44-year-olds, according to new data analysis from Manchester university. 

Northerners in that age group were 47% more likely to die from cardiovascular complications, 109% from alcohol misuse and 60% from drug misuse, compared with southerners, the paper published in the Lancet Publie Health medical journal said. 

Between 2014 and 2016,3,530 more men and 1,881 more women aged between 25 and 44 died in the north than in the south, when population and age are taken into account. 

Research also found that fatal traffic accidents are far more common in the north than the south, with nine of the 10 lowest-risk counties in the south.