Saturday, December 26, 2020

Today & me. Digging my soul.

When I was 21
I decided
That I wanted to have the best life
Since then ::
I have lost teeth
Dodged a pick-axe swung in anger
Ten years of acid indigestion 
Dodged a meat cleaver as above
Heart & soul close to teens 
Weeks in Crown Court with them
Alongside in the Old Bailey cells
Discovered own weaknesses
Listened to the horrific story’s 
Discovered my own feelings
Started to to manage them
Became an ‘Emotion Detective’
Lived alongside violence
Loved the most violent
Learned how to see through behaviour 
Every day learning on the job
Team work always best
Objectivs = a Helping Relationship
Learned how to love the unlovely
Experience my own weeping
Writing to offload 
Emptying my soul to examine it
Holding confidentiality 

Discovered having the best life
To kneel
To be scared
To be loved
To be beautiful imperfection

All this because of that act of kneeling by my bed-side aged 21, asking a distanced God if I could come closer and accept the best life on offer.