Friday, May 18, 2007

.... I am on the London Tube
writing mindmap notes in my little book
I see humans all around me
close close - so close
calm ones
newspapers in many faces
bodies so close as if we knew each other
no words around
me too.

I was so tired this morning commuting out
could not read much of the Guardian
I closed my eyes for sometime
breathing underground air
I relaxed
I came alive once I was amongst humans .......

Feel I am learning more than ever
Deep drilling more than ever
aware I am yet so unaware
more than ever
unconsciously incompetent
I don't know what I am unaware of.....

Humans make life worth living
I drink in as they discover
with mine .........

A person so locked in
taking a risk for her own development
taking her clothes off - like
soul undressing
vulnerability by choice
knockout for all of us

Love seeing humans leaning forward - engaging
others leaning back - disengaging
another showing disapproval without words
Love seeing their eyes - who they are gripped by
the arms move to the 'folded' position
a face has just left the room
the mind behind it is - elsewhere.

Someone wants to control their feelings
feelings need managing - not controlling
feelings are essential signals
do you drive through red lights?

Yes it is Lifewilson here and I think about so many things and all of them start with my feelings.
Subconsciously - mostly.
I am trying to be more sensitive to my feelings. Feeling every one.
I believe that most of our feelings are unfelt.
Yet our behaviour demonstrates them to another!
What's that all about?

Thinking gets in the way of feelings sometimes. We think of lots of things but, so often, don't think about our feelings.
So we drift away with our thoughts which are triggered by feelings which are triggered by stimulants. Exterior ones - and from the interior.

So read the right things
mix with the right humans
and the right humans are ............................................................