Wednesday, January 13, 2016

I inwardly cringe with disgust at his racism. - Group Work experiences

Spent one hour listening and talking with one man 
who just gulped cans of 'red stripe' lager as we spoke. 
He is dependent on the liquid. 
Friendly and accepting of me and …..
.... I inwardly cringe with disgust at his racism. 

He is not unattractive. 
He is talkative and 
I find it easy to relax with him but... 
my innards cringe at his state of mind 
and at the same time I feel for him with compassion. 

Then later I run a group session. 
He is there and about 12 others. 
For a time. 
Only about half stay and see the session process through. 
They come and go. 
I accept that because it is not school. 

The biggest struggle is to stay positive 
because every 15 seconds the discussion turns to the negative. 
Usually personal statements. 
'Self revelation' it is called. 
It needs to come out but it is not good 
when it gushes from hurting souls without a balance. 

So it is draining for me. 
The 121's and the groups. 
But I want to do this. 
It is needed and I CAN offer something. 

So I reflect on me and my experience and skills and sensitivity. 
Mission of life.? 
How I can do it better.? 
Be more human and in touch with them …
and Creator  
and not care about management 
and job security but ….
.... being the 'flesh' there 
which is as appropriate as can be. 

Can you understand all this? 
I share my feelings of walking alongside 
some beautiful and damaged humans. 
You may not see the pictures before me as I see it. 
Feel the individual hurts and beauty ….
... but hope you can sense mine? 

Well …
.... wishing you love and wonder ..... ………..