Friday, December 20, 2013

I wouldn’t do my duty if I were to tell you “Merry Christmas” without giving trouble to you.

Christmas is coming.
Many I know are excited
others fragile physically
others fragile emotionally
others very ill
others no money for basics
others alone
others cannot go home
others not welcome in any home
foodbank ............

I used to dislike Christmas.
I had the emotional HUMP about it.
It = there was so much going on
glitter and tinsel stuff
Father Christmas
and all the trimmings
and I couldn't 
bring the two ways of living together.

I felt cheating of my faith.
I felt I had to compromise my values.
My beliefs ..............

I have become more joined up now.
I think
I feel
I am more emotionally socially spiritually

Maybe not?
Maybe I am just going with the flow?
Maybe I always did that?

Church has never done it for me.
I have always attended church since becoming ....
But it is not all I have.
I want to live spiritually outside
as well as belonging inside.
I always need space to work things through.
In Church sometimes.
Late at night sometimes
Writing sometimes - moreso.

For many Christmases in my life I together with family
have been on duty in a Hostel.
ONLY those present had no-where to go.
Left Overs!

We always made the very best of the occasion.
It was a privilege to serve.
Treats were welcomed and beautifully so.
Some BHP's would come to eat Christmas Dinner
then hide away.
Some would welcome some interaction and even help out.
I feel.

Some years ago
I facilitated a large team from around Europe.
All staff of a large company
multi-billion pound annual turnover.
A small numer have kept in contact.
Christmas connects distant lives.

One BHP sent me this poem.

I want to share it with you::

I wouldn’t do my duty if I were to tell you
“Merry Christmas” without giving trouble to you.
I want to annoy you instead.
I can’t stand the idea
Of being forced to address innocent
Formal wishes imposed by the calendar routine.
It allures me on the contrary
The hypothesis of someone sending them back
To the sender as unwished.
Many uncomfortable wishes then!
May Jesus who is born out of love make you sick
With an egoist , absurd life with no vertical pushes.
And may she warrant you the strength to invent yourself a life
Full of donating, prayers, silence and hope.


Don Tonino Bello