Saturday, July 13, 2013

Imposed and choosing to be vulnerable.

Hey - how are you?
OK thanks
All right thanks
NOT acceptable.

Why am I afraid to tell you who I am
because if I tell you who I am
and you don't like who I am,
that is all I have.
(Title of my favourite book of all time.)

So I have a striving imperfection commitment to tell you who I am -- here.
I am aware that that is odd.
I am odd.
Different is a nicer word.
Unique is a most beautiful, best, description.
But, I will not argue with 'odd'.

We all have times when we feel vulnerable.
We don't choose them.
They happen.
This emotional literacy I keep clicking about,going on about,
is all about how to handle such times.
And many other feelings too.

One time recently,
I felt vulnerable - well - a lot more than than once.
I recently saw a little video clip of myself.
I have not had that experience for some time.
(I have a good face for radio - but a bad voice).
I felt vulnerable because I looked really so old.
I was surprised.
I don't feel like that human I saw.
Yet that human was me!

I bet you have those feelings too sometimes.
I know I am not on my own.

I share my vulnerability here with you.

Part two::
One step on is not only expecting vulnerable feelings/situations,

and striving to manage them, but
choosing to be vulnerable,

choosing to be in vulnerable situations.
Not to be a sad-o. Not to be a sadist. Not to be self persecuting -
but for the benefit of others and self.

If we all live in the best housing we can afford.
If we all network with those just like us.
If we all drink and eat in our social strata -
we are all like sheep without a Shepherd.

Seems to me.

Where I am coming from,
that place called ODD
which I refereed to earlier,
we are sheep without a Shepherd
unless we are choosing life not letting life happen.

That choice not taken by the non-deciding human, means
Africa will die of aids.
Inner cities will reproduce.
Colours separate
Humans of faith separate
Crime will be something we are victims of
rather than what some of our friends do.
Difficult behaviour will be family upsets, only,
without the wider/larger/communal/societal/cosmic ones.

If you are a regular in this place you will know that I repeat often::
'Growth does not reside in a place called comfortable'.
(It is also the title of a 'workshop' I am leading at The Adlerian week).

The principle is -
if we have a mission or purpose,
we have a chosen direction.
That is always imperfection in my experience.
There are always fumbling and stumbling.
Always mistakes.
Always changes to direction
Always learning
Always learning from mistakes
Always tough times - but
we still have a greater purpose than just surfing.
Surfing life.
Surfing every issue to just get the best out of it for self.

All this is linked to Spiritual Literacy - being in tune with a greater spiritual influence
All this is linked to Emotional Literacy - being a student of understanding emotions and learning to manage them.
All this is linked to Behavioural Literacy - being able respond with positive personal behaviour, managing feelings, rather than being controlled by them.

How are you?
I bet some humans will not click this way again ..............

If you have got feelings right now
(we have them all the time I believe)
What are those feelings?
What are you planning to do with them?
Another glass of wine?
Reach for the remote?
Jump to another blog?
Tweet a bit?

It seems to me,
me - this odd human here,
that what we do with the triggers and hooks that we bump in to in life,
all depends on what kind of human we have decided to become.

I think I need others who are stumblers with me.
Maybe on a different route.
Maybe ahead of me on the road,
Maybe limping behind ............
but all of us on a journey and connecting.
Residing together on a journey.
I feel I need you.
Certainly want you.