Why am I afraid to tell you who I am
because if I tell you who I am
and you don't like who I am
that is all I have.
That is the title of my favourite book of all time and
it has been for some years.
Above is the title on the 'back' cover.
The front cover calls it;
"Why am I afraid to tell you who I am"
That discovery of 'who I am' has been fantastic.
Still is.
It is ongoing.
It is the greatest journey.
Inward.
I am here.
If we can be in touch with 'who I am'
that means
knowing we are feeling something
clocking it
taking it to the head
into our brain
into the centre
the soul
THEN we can begin to really work on life
enjoy
stretch
own pain
own failure
own weakness
own richness
own skills
own awareness
own experiences
own beauty
Owning the beauty of creation
it vital
I
am
talking
about
you
your
own
your
beauty.
I was talking to this human
there was a most beautiful expression of feelings.
pain
joy
discovery
family
friends
art
creativity
stumbling
hurting
passionate
thirsting
Yes I was with this human and a delight it was.
I learn as the human drags my eyes as I want to catch every expression
every word
the lip movements
the brow
the hands
leaning
back
forward
use of my name
everything.
Now I can see another human
I was there
I heard the words
saw
"I feel like sticking him"
"I feel like sticking him"
These words were dragging my eyes to the demonstrated stabbing movements
I did not want to see
stabbing movements
and the facial expression
repeated words
repeated stabbing movements
repeated twisted facial pain.
I have to be with both humans
to miss any one would be not owning life as it is.
If there is a step into clocking
them feelings
there is light
a journey through a tunnel
maybe
but
illuminated
at
the
end
BHP
