Monday, February 02, 2004

I have feelings.
They are about the group and about myself. In fact they are about humans.
The artifacts around are significant but they don't generate many feelings in me. Humans do.

I have feelings.
Normally I am buzzing with the interactive blessings touching my soul. Right now I feel a deep sadness. It is not depression and anything serious, but it is a bit of a cloud draped over my soul.

I have feelings because;
1 I think I felt the group didn't work well.
2 the numbers were ok, even though a number left early and others drifted in. Normal!
3 Maybe the content/material was not what scratched them.
4 feel also that certain individuals were not ready for the group, even though they came.
5 The feelings I think, were ..... are a feeling of failure. I was not on top. I was not able to be the group leader I would like to be.
6 feelings also that certain individuals were not cooperating ....... but that is normal.
7 so maybe it was me and this process is confronting myself by this reflective process. yes it was me. Own it wilson. So I learn and I will step on. I will be motivated and do one more attempt at walking a million miles. Taking the next step ..... that is.

The eternal lover will use my weaknesses and my strengths but there is more to dig out ...