Sunday, January 18, 2004

I am sat on my wi-fi + fav armchair and listening to pete tong streaming down from net to lazy sunday afternoon me.
Tong IS on the programme this week. Will somebody tell the bbc that I don't like it one of my favorite radio programmes has someone sitting in too damn often. This year it has all gone pete tong. Alternatives are not good enough. I tape and then don't want it.

We had a fab lamb roast dinner after church today. Now Joan is watching the football as the norm. And I love the wi-fi and am delighted that Martin has got it installed see so that means when I visit Joy, I am instantly and streamingly good online.

think about this
I ask a young woman why she is crying.
She says I communicated she was unattractive.
She says someone told her yesterday she was unattractive.
She said she has always felt unattractive.

I made that up. Sometimes we meet and interact with humans and there is conflict. Sometimes it is our interaction which is the last straw.
Tears or in some cases more obnoxious behaviour and even violence.
Behaviour it seems to me is NOT only about the immediate. Often the damage has been done over the years or certainly a long time ago.

I have worked with humans all my life who have, it is said, have 'behavioural problems'. Certainly I have experienced terrorized sleep all too often. Once I remember Joan getting up in the middle of the night and being violently sick. This was all due to the tension I was living under and she was picking up the damage second hand. These were the east-end London days. Gangs. Professional crime. Professional violence. I shiver now at the thought.

It is vital to look beyond the behaviour ..... I keep saying in these blogs.
To only feel the tears or see the tears is not enough. The story, the journey of the weeping human is all part of the behaviour and therefore our response. We need to be response-able. Respond with love no matter what.

"there is no such a thing as a difficult person, only difficult behaviour"

I need to think more about this as it is vital for life ............. that person I will next see weeping ........... and myself.



"work like you don't need the money
dance like no-one is watching
sing like no-one is listening
love like you have never been hurt"